2025 in 2025: Day 168

Speak - Lindsay Lohan

Compared to A Little More Personal (Raw), this is much more of a teen pop album. Which is not a bad thing. Fun, mostly upbeat, basic lyrics and all easily singalongable.

Highlights: Disconnected, Over, First, Symptoms of You

7/10

Speak for Yourself - Imogen Heap

There was this six month period of 2005 where it seemed like everyone was on the Imogen Heap hype train. Which is crazy, because this album is just nothing!

Highlights: Hide and Seek, The Walk

6.5/10

Speakerboxxx - Outkast

Holy cow, this is so much better than I remember. Or at least much better than The Love Below. They really should have just made one great album instead, because this just straight-up hip-hop coolness. Big Boi is severely underrated and all the features here are rad, as well.

Highlights: Flip-Flop Rock, Last Call, The Way You Move, War

7.5/10

Spellbound - Split Enz

These dudes were the greatest musical act in New Zealand history and this marathon is only convincing me it is not close.

Highlights: Message to My Girl, History Never Repeats, Six Months in a Leaky Boat, I See Red

8/10

Spend the Night - The Donnas

Modern rock bands could learn a thing or two from The Donnas. This album, specifically, where every song is either 'this dude sucks' or 'this dude has a big dong so he should let me ride it'. Lessons learned!

Highlights: I Don't Care (So There), 5 O'Clock in the Morning, Too Bad About Your Girl, Take It Off

9/10

SPICE - SCANDAL

When my girls rock, they rock hard. This is almost the most typically Japanese rock song they have done in years.

8/10

Spice - Spice Girls

Is there a more perfect pop album? Sure, maybe. But these women will forever have my heart. I never really noticed before that there is some heavy UK funk influence in here - which explains why it registered so well with me? And god help the mister that comes between me and my sisters!

Highlights: Say You'll Be There, Who Do You Think You Are?, Love Thing, Wannabe

9/10

Spice: 25th Anniversary Deluxe Edition - Spice Girls

I have already complained about this and there certainly is a lot missing, but what is here is actually decent and it is great to have this much in one place.

Highlights: One of These Girls, Spice Chat 2, Say You'll Be There [7" Radio Edit], If You Can't Dance [Demo Version]

7/10

Spiceworld - Spice Girls

Definitely less funk influence and more of a throwback to 60s pop and soul, in my opinion. But still very awesome. Melvins B and C were the coolest.

Highlights: Do It, Move Over, Stop, Saturday Night Divas

9/10

Spiceworld: 25th Anniversary Deluxe Edition - Spice Girls

Similar to the Spice: 25th Anniversary Deluxe Edition, there is a lot missing here, and instead time is devoted to remixes and live versions. At least we got the other Pepsi song!

Highlights: Step to Me [7" Mix], Outer Space Girls, Spice Girls Party Mix

7/10

Spiceworld Tour Live At Wembley Stadium 20-09-1998 - Spice World

I had this on VHS, but missed out on getting the DVD - which now sells for more than the price of a locomotive. But I also did not watch my VHS all that much, back in the day. It is good, but Geri is missing and it is noticeable. Although they did play a recording of her singing in Spanish during If You Can't Dance. They also announce they are staying together and then broke up two years later...

Highlights: Who Do You Think You Are?, Sisters Are Doin' It For Themselves, Say You'll Be There, We Are Family

7/10

Spike - Elvis Costello

This is only the single Veronica. I actually do not know much of Elvis Costello's works. I keep telling myself to one day do a bit of listen, but then forget and just listen to The Shit...

7.5/10

Spirit - Leona Lewis

I think I enjoyed her second album more? Like, the ballads are impressive... well, a couple are, but the rest is very forgettable.

Highlights: Whatever It Takes, I Will Be, The Best You Never Had, Bleeding Love

6.5/10

The Spirit Room - Michelle Branch

Why do I not have full albums by Michelle Branch? The songs I have by her are pop perfection, yet I have not heard anything else? I make no sense. Oh yeah, this is All You Wanted.

9/10

Spirit: Stallion Of The Cimerron - Bryan Adams & Hans Zimmer

Bryan Adams makes a lot songs for movies and has done since the 90s. This is the rare occasion he made a full album's worth. Well, almost; Hans Zimmer does provide a few songs of pure score. BA is pretty good at evoking emotion, so it makes sense.

Highlights: Here I Am (End Title), Sound the Bugle, Don't Let Go, This is Where I Belong

7/10

"Albums" listened to so far: 1595

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2025 in 2025: Day 105

Join The Dots: B-Sides & Rarities 1978-2001 - The Cure

Being a chronological collection, the first disc is mostly post-punk early The Cure. I am a bit conflicted as to the inclusion of a song that was re-recorded here, though. Robert Smith's voice is so different it really sticks out. Disc 2 is where we get stuff that I prefer; 80s darkwave is where The Cure are best. And Throw Your Foot may well be the most pure 80s pop song they made. Disc 3 is also my jam, but it is wild that this only covers 1 album and then a bunch of soundtrack songs (that are all stupendous). But then I am one of those weirdos that appreciates Wish. Half of disc 4 is just remixes and alternate versions. It is fun to think that this collection is 20 years old now - which almost covers the same period of this collection - so maybe we will get a volume 2 at some point? It would be far less exhaustive, considering they have only released 3 albums in that time (as opposed to the 11 they released between 1978 and 2001 - plus all the singles and EPs), but it would mean I could get rid of those b-sides collections I had to listen to earlier...

Highlights: The Exploding Boy, Burn, Pillbox Tales, Throw Your Foot, Sugar Girl, Snow in Summer, Play, Halo

6.5/10

Join With Us - The Feeling

This album starts off strong and the title track is absolute fire. From there, it is a bit average. Still somewhat enjoyable, but just does not quite click for me. Maybe I judge too harshly, since their first album was just a big bag of fun?

Highlights: Join With Us, I Thought It Was Over, Without You, The Greatest Show on Earth

6.5/10

Josie and The Pussycats: Music from the Motion Picture - Josie and The Pussycats (and DuJour?)

This movie, like Spiceworld: The Movie, is my favourite kind of comfort comedy. I love it and quote it to myself all the time. And this soundtrack is the kind of girly pop punk that ticks all of my boxes. I just read that Bif Naked sang some stuff on this and last night I saw her music video to promote Ready to Rumble. Coincidence!

Highlights: 3 Small Words, Pretend to Be Nice, Spin Around, Shapeshifter

9/10

Journey's Greatest Hits - Journey

A grand collection of Journey doing Journey things; rockin' and balladin' and touchin' and squeezin' and lovin'!

Highlights: Any Way You Want I, Be Good to Yourself, Ask the Lonely, Don't Stop Believin', Faithfully, Wheel in the Sky

9/10

joy - YUKI

I consider this album to be YUKI really finding her footing. But her voice had not quite caught up to what she was trying to do. And, again, live versions of these songs are even better. This album is just an absolute gem.

Highlights: WAGON, キスをしようよ, JOY, ハローグッバイ

8/10

Judgment Night: Music From the Motion Picture - Various Artists

From a terribly underwhelming movie came the most insane soundtrack the world would ever see; popular grunge and metal bands teaming up with rap and hip-hop stars. Revolutionary. And, amazingly, it all works so well. A hardcore good time. 

Highlights: Just Another Victim - Helmet & House of Pain, Fallin' - Teenage Fanclub & De la Soul, Me Myself & My Microphone - Living Colur & Run DMC, Missing Link - Dinosaur Jr. & Del the Funky Homosapien

8.5/10

Juno: Music from the Motion Picture - Various Artists

I think I got this free with the DVD of the movie. And I am not sure if I have watched the movie since I got it on DVD. I think the only DVDs I watch are the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles series and Air Bud? Blu-ray or UHD all the way, baby! This is peak late-00s indie hipster folk and it is barely tolerable.

Highlights: All The Young Dudes - Mott the Hoople, Dearest - Buddy Holly, All I Want Is You - Barry Louis Polisar

5.5/10

Jupiter - Bump of Chicken

It is Bump of Chicken doing Bump of Chicken things. Nothing outstanding. All rather enjoyable in the background.

Highlights: 天体観測, ハルジオン, メロディーフラッグ, ダイヤモンド

7/10

Just Blaq - MBLAQ

This is purely the song Oh Yeah, to further my random K-Pop collection of miscellaneous songs. It is a fun upbeat track.

8/10

Just the Beginning Tour 2017 - Ayumi Hamasaki

This is the tour finale, I think? The tour was 3 parts and I went to the final of part II and then the opening night of part III. So while it is not a show I attended, it is great to have a document of that tour. Even if they were not shows with a live band and Ayu's voice on this is clearly tired. Still an absolutely killer setlist. And this arrangement of Ourselves needs to be preserved for eternity. 

Highlights: Ourselves, FLOWER, Memorial address, SEVEN DAYS WAR

8/10

Justified - Justin Timberlake

When this came out, I had no interest in NSYNC or Justin Timberlake. In fact, I would say I actively disliked him. And his falsetto annoyed me. But Like I Love You broke me down with how danceable it is. And then he followed it up with more super dance fun. I definitely think this album is a mixed bag and half of Pharrell's stuff is tired and played out, but Timbaland is in classic Timbaland form, so it sounds like JT just guesting on some Missy tracks or something. 

Highlights: Rock Your Body, Like I Love You, (Oh No) What You Got, Right For Me

7/10

"Albums" listened to so far: 908

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WrestleMania Easter Extravaganza: WrestleMania XXXIX, Night Two

2 April 2023

So-Fi Stadium
Inglewood, California - USA

Attendance: 67,553

Commentators: Michael Cole & Corey Graves

My thoughts before this viewing:
As mentioned yesterday (3 hours ago), when they ran down the card for this show, I was actually filled with hope. And jealousy. Because I think I may actually give a hoot about some of these matches. And all the worst people were part of night one. Except The Miz is still hosting. But, again, I will take that over him actually wrestling.

America The Beautiful
Jimmie Allen is somebody that I've never known. And he really dressed up for the occasion.

He just grooves on his own for a little bit and, hey, at least he sang the ending well?
5/10

Opening Video Package
Kevin Hart is back... in a bath robe.

Tonight is "more star power". No shit - Austin Theory and Brock Lesnar are not the same. Also, this is not a sequel; the first time they did "WrestleMania Hollywood" was WrestleMania XXI, so at this point it is more of a trilogy.

It's The fucking Miz and Snoop Dogg the WWE Marijuana Champion? The Miz does his arm thing again and just looks genuinely awkward. And shit.

Opening Match
Brock Lesnar vs Omos (w/MVP)

Omos just throws Lesnar around and it is fantastic! He eventually makes a mistake, so Lesnar takes him to suplex city.

Winner = Brock Lesnar via pinfall following an F5
6/10

Maaaan that was too quick!

WWE Shop offer free shipping again - they said it was yesterday only, so their shop lies as well? It's like they're not even trying anymore, but hey, neither am I!

Big E is still stuck at the vending machine.

Who plays these shitty WWE video games? I'll stick to WCW Backstage Assault, thank you very muchly.

"WrestleMania Showcase Fatal Four-Way Tag-Team"
Liv Morgan & Raquel Rodriguez vs Shotzi & Natalya vs Chelsea Green & Sonya Deville vs 'Rowdy' Ronda Rousey & Shayna Baszler

Liv has yet another new tag-team partner at WrestleMania. Wow, Rousey has really fallen off, huh? I don't think this Raquel is related to Rogan. Everyone is scared of her and she just laughably shrugs off a dropkick. Natalya goes for the double Sharpshooter. Where have Rousey and Baszler been? Because they sure haven't been in this match - they haven't even been on the apron awaiting a tag or anything. And why is Baszler missing a boot??

Winners = 'Rowdy' Ronda Rousey & Shayna Baszler via submission (Rousey with an armbar on Shotzi)
5/10

Rousey and Baszler celebrate for longer than they were in the match.

Video Package
More bullshit about Dominik Mysterios bad new friends. They used to hang out with Edge? Oh, wait - I think this is that faction they kinda started at WrestleMania XXXIX - so when I predicted they wouldn't be together by the next WrestleMania, I was kinda right - because they gave Edge the boot. Fair enough, he is old and boring.
5/10

Highlight of the Night again? The last one had zero to do with this actual night... and neither does this one! Bobby Lashley threw some fat dude out of the ring and won the Andre The Giant Battle Royal. And now he's on the stage to show off his trophy. Usually that would be the prelude to someone coming out and trashing it... but nope, this is just Lashley waving and holding his trophy like a dork. Corey Graves pretends this is some sort of amazing achievement that will only further Lashley's career. I think I will never hear this mentioned again... possibly because I don't watch WWE outside of WrestleMania...

Xavier Woods and his band of dorks run another video game simulation for the next match. If this were WCW Backstage Assault, I would just play as La Parka and beat their asses with a chair. Or a flaming 2x4.

Video Package
Some German dude has been whooping people and is now the Intercontinental Champion. Sheamus wants to challenge him. Drew McIntyre... has a sword. So it's a battle of the European dudes. Except it seems a bit more about Sheamus and McIntyre than the champion.
5/10

Titus is back on commentary for another round of impersonating Dusty Rhodes and I'm here for it.

Oh shit, more commercials? This particular match gets its own sponsor??

WWE Intercontinental Championship
Triple Threat
Drew McIntyre vs Sheamus vs Gunther (c)
I think this is first I'm seeing of the new Intercontinental belt. Or I just haven't been paying attention - which is VERY possible. Gunther delivers some massive chops and they just look hilarious on Sheamus. Then Gunther and McIntyre have a full-on chop battle. Chops and slaps for everyone! Sheamus pounds on McIntyre so much he looks gassed! Sheamus has it won, but McIntyre interferes. Gunther powerbombs Sheamus on to McIntyre and then powerbombs McIntyre for fun!

Winner = Gunther via pinfall following powerbombs for both Sheamus and Drew McIntyre. Equal opportunity powerbombs!
8/10

Bah gawd that was physical - almost to the point of being uncomfortable, but not quite, so it was just awesome. The commentators give it a standing ovation.

The Miz pays children to like him. Creepy.

WWE exploiting kids and stuff again.

Video Package
Bianca Belair won the title at the previous WrestleMania. And the two before that, but they don't seem to want to mention those. Asuka has new facepaint. And they show fans booing her, so we all know she is the villain here.
4/10

Raw Women's Championship
Bianca Belair (c) vs Asuka
Asuka never wins at WrestleMania, so I think Belair is in for a longer title reign. The really should hire a Japanese artist to perform Asuka's entrance theme. Or just get the rights to Rule by Ayumi Hamasaki. Belair keeps the night's theme of 'children are cheap labour' by having a bunch of kids dancing during her entrance. And holy shit the commentators have listened to me and are shutting the fuck up during these entrances! Asuka hits a whole lots of spinning shit. Belair is strong! Asuka misses the mist and gets an armbar, but yeah Belair is strong.

Winner = Bianca Belair via pinfall following her KOD or whatever it is called
7/10

Asuka's WrestleMania losing streak continues! She must surely be close to Big Show's record by now.

Alpha Academy are much less interesting than a chocolate bar.

Recap of the main event last night, because The Usos actually losing a match at WrestleMania is wildly unbelievable.

Things have been going well, so now it's time for The Miz and Snoop Dogg. They are trying to claim both nights attendance as one total, but I would guess 90% of the people here tonight were here yesterday. I mean, some of these dudes in the front row haven't even changed their clothes. The Miz bitches at Snoop Dogg about having to wrestle Pat McAfee... and it sounds like Snoop Dogg is going to make him wrestle again?

Shane McMahon vs The Miz
BAHAHAHAHA Shane immediately blows his knee attempting a leap frog.

No contest?

Snoop Dogg is pissed and takes it out on The Miz. Oh, now it's really on...

Snoop Dogg vs The Miz
A "People's Elbow" so hilarious, I can hear those wacky Germans laughing at 4am from the other side of the world. And a year in the past...

Winner = Snoop Dogg via pinfall following Snoopy's elbow?
10/10 no notes

Video Package
Edge worked his way to the top by being a total dick? Then he retired due to injury. He was a dick, so that's what you get. Finn Balor rose up in his place, or something. Edge came back after 9 years and claimed he was a better man, but he formed this Judgment Day group and they are bad guys. So bad, they turned on Edge. Rhea Ripley beat up Edge's wife. So why is Edge so mad at Balor? Why isn't he fighting Ripley?? The narrative here was all over the place.
2/10

Hell in a Cell
Edge vs Finn Balor
Trying to make an entrance all spooky with candles and shit does not work when doing it during the day time. Oh, wait - it's a tie-in for a fucking movie. WCW did this shit as well. Edge is disco gimp??

He's wearing a jacket with the old 'The Brood' logo and Cole says they debuted in 1997. Considering Edge debuted months before the rest of The Brood and he himself didn't debut until WrestleMania XIV in 1998, you can fuck off with your misinformation. Immediately with the weapons and Balor just no sells chair shots. Edge apparently regrets forming Judgment Day and now wants to make up for it by destroying his creation - just like Ted Dibiase and the NWO. More weapons. These painted kendo sticks look like folded drinks umbrellas. The crowd call for tables, because they are clearly invested in this story. Balor is leaking blood, so the match stops? And we switch to a wide shot so the viewers can't see him being tended to by a doctor. That's actually lamer than in WCW. Edge kills time during this break by looking for more weapons and then doing nothing with them. The match resumes... Balor makes noises like he's the fucking Tasmanian Devil. He lays Edge on a table and bahahaha it immediately splits perfectly in the middle.

Winner = Edge via pinfall following a con-chair-to
5/10

That was fucking silly. And pausing the match to tend to a cut completely killed any momentum it might have been gaining. Edge should go talk to Bret Hart about how great his match with 'Rowdy' Roddy Piper would have been if they had stopped it to clean up his blood.

Montage of WWE doucheburgers re-enacting famous scenes from various movies. Hold up; one of these dudes drops an F-bomb, but blood in a wrestling match is not allowed?!?!

Backstage Interview
Kayla still works here! Bianca Belair is partying with little children. Find some friends your own age!

Backlash. Bad Bunny. Boring.

Hall of Fame: Class of 2023
This year's inductees were Stacey Kiebler and Andy Kaufman. Obviously there were young girls in attendance, because Jerry 'the King' Lawler had to provide his speech via online. The Great Muta was inducted - despite never wrestling for WWE - as well as.. a referee? Oh, and Rey Mysterio. But not Rey Mysterio, Jr.? He was awesome in WCW. And that Adidas suit is something.

WrestleMania XL will always be sunny in Philadelphia.

More highlights of night one, like I didn't already watch that shit.

The Miz thinks you should gamble.

The Weeknd are still providing WrestleMania theme songs. And they are still terrible.

Do the Safety Dance in jail after you fail to do your taxes properly?

No wonder this company makes so much money they have to cut people due to budget cuts...

Video Package
Cody Rhodes has wanted to be WWE Champion since he was 8 years old and now he is going to finish his story. So he'll win and then die?? You know, all weekend these pre-match videos have been providing all sorts of backstory and helping the casual viewer (e.g. LOGMAN) informed of the story behind the matches. But then when it comes to the main event, they tell us absolutely nothing. That's the WWE I know!
6/10

Main Event
Undisputed WWE Championship
Cody Rhodes vs Roman Reigns (c) (w/Paul Heyman and some other dude named Solo?)
Reigns is introduced by... pianists? Michael Cole hilariously mocks Cody Rhodes for failing to become an actor when he was younger. And then he goes on to bag on The American Dream for never winning the WWE Heavyweight Championship. I mean, he came to the WWF for a grand total of 18 months in the midst of Hulkamania and was stuck feuding with the likes of Big Bossman and Honky Tonk Man. Hardly the respect a multiple-time NWA Heavyweight World Champion deserved. Paul Heyman babbles something about Roman Reigns "owning an island of relevancy". Honestly sounds like something Roger Moore would have said in Spice World. Haha what the commentators are impressed Rhodes knows the rules. Reigns dominates forever, until Rhodes eventually gets some offense and Cole is all like 'Wow, he's not just going to get smoked like a chump!' Ham Solo gets ejected from the match, but why do they bother agreeing to it? If they disqualify Reigns, he would still be champion. Rhodes hits a Crossroads and not even Heyman can pretend that was getting a three-count. Graves calls Reigns a "great white shark". Racist! Aaand here come the finishers! Reigns goes for a guillotine off his back and I'm pretty sure his shoulders were down for like a twenty-count. It's the main event at WrestleMania, so of course that means we gotta have the referee knocked out! Cole acts like it has never happened before. Well, allow me to check my notes...

*checks notes*

It's happened in the last 50 main events. Fuck you. The Usos run in and hit some superkicks and their Dudley Boys rip-off finisher. So Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens Mac chase them off. Rhodes recovers and hits a bunch of Crossroads... so Ham Solo comes back and murders Rhodes or something.

Winner = Roman Reigns via pinfall following a spear
6/10

If the referee was actually competent, he would have realised Ham Solo had disobeyed his order to leave the ringside and reversed his decision. And THAT would have been a fitting tribute to Dusty Rhodes!

I'll be honest; I knew the result of this and that probably hampered my enjoyment of the match. Michael Cole calls this the greatest title reign of all-time. HAHAHAHAHA no.

We get fan reactions and then it's pyro and posing and peace out!

WrestleMania XXXIX, Night Two: The Awards

1. Best Match
   Drew McIntyre vs Sheamus vs Gunther
   Very physical and very fun!
   
2. Worst Match
   Edge vs Finn Balor
   Like most Edge matches since he returned, it was slow and not all that exciting.
3. Highlight of the Show
   Snoop Dogg with the worst 'People's Elbow' ever? Shane O'Mac blowing his knee and thus ruining whatever they had planned?
4. Lowlight of the Show
   The Miz as host, although that is better than him wrestling. But then he went and did that, too. Again.
5. Star of the Show
   I mean... there really are no stars here?
6. Best Celebrity Appearance
   Snoop Dogg for doing barely anything and getting some sort of WWE belt out of it. Also, shout out to Rick Rubin for sitting behind the Spanish announce table at some point but obviously not agreeing to be on camera.
7. Worst Celebrity Appearance
   I don't think there were any other celebrities tonight, but Logan Paul was in the highlights from last night, so let's just go with him, because fuck that douche.
8. Tonight's Meal
   Dear readers, I'm not going to lie to you; tonight I went kinda cheap. I had simple wraps of a Hoki filet on spinach with some baba ghanoush and a bit of coleslaw, all in a garlic butter wrap. I wasn't excited for this show, so didn't go all out on the meals this year. But I sure went 200% on the PepsiMax with Raspberry...
9. T-Shirt Cleanliness
   I can't say for certain, but I may have only got a bit of sauce on my sleeve. Which led to a great deal of panic, because this Hart Foundation hockey jersey was far more expensive than that white t-shirt I threw a WrestleMania logo...
10. Overall Score
    That was a WrestleMania! I had a nap after day one and a whole bottle of Pepsi, so maybe that helped my attitude, but there was genuinely not a bad match and some really fun ones to boot. As always, the skits and ads and hosts were fucking awful, and having the bad guy win the main event is kind of a downer, but otherwise this was probably the best WrestleMania I have watched in years.
    7 out of 10

Music Talk: Spice Girls

 Readers of this bLog may or not be aware of my love for the Spice Girls. I guess it would depend on a) if we are friends in real life (not bloody likely), and b) if we have been friends for a long time (even less bloody likely). All you need to know is that I have a box in storage that contains a bunch of Spice Girls VHS tapes and some fold out poster book. I had a sticker book as well, but I didn't manage to complete it. For shame! Needless to say, 1998 meant singing Spice Girls songs and corrupting all my workmates into enjoying their music as well. Imagine a bunch of 18/19 year-old dudes getting high and listening to Spice Girls or watching a Spice Girls concert - because that was what we did after work most nights. 

Anyways... they released 25th anniversary editions of their first two albums, and I held off purchasing them for multiple reasons; I was disappointed with the content on the bonus discs, the price was a bit off, and quite frankly I don't listen to them anymore. In fact, I think a few years ago I was looking in my iTunes and it was showing Spiceworld had never been played! That doesn't mean I don't still love them, because I certainly do! In fact, during one of our glorious lockdowns and watched some documentary on Spice Girls and girl power - which was actually very interesting, even if none of the Spice Girls themselves were actually involved. But read my bLog: the only music in English I listen to these days is Prince, Elvis or Kiss. Mostly Prince. I've eased up a bit on that lately and have been revisiting some stuff I haven't listened to in years. So when I saw that I could get the 25th Anniversary edition of Spice for cheap, I decided to jump on it. But then, being a completist, this meant I needed to buy the 25th Anniversary edition of Spiceworld as well - well, waiting for it to be on some sort of special as well. And while I didn't get it quite as cheap, it was still discounted enough for me to dash to the counter with it. Here's hoping Forever gets the same treatment, because that album is an underrated gem that even I didn't appreciate in 2000. I had clearly lost coolness in the space of 2 years.

Anyways, I'm sitting here giving them a listen and I'm reminded that Spice and Spiceworld are seriously just the best pop albums. And the remasters sound great. But boy, these bonus discs are almost a waste of time. Hilariously, I had somehow removed Viva Forever from my iTunes some years ago, and since all of my compact discs are boxed up in storage, it always felt like way too much hassle to go and find it just to replace that one song. So it 's quite nice to be able to listen to that song once again.

I think Spice World is going to need a good viewing on Sunday morning. Funnily enough, I have also just recently purchased the DVD. I had ordered it many many years ago, but it was actually stolen out of my mailbox. I know this, because the thief left the empty post bag in my driveway. But honestly, I can't really blame them; as far as musical comedies go, it is one of the best and wasn't so easy to find on DVD, so I hope they enjoy the movie as much as I do. And then I just started waiting for a blu-ray... and now I've given up on that entirely, so it seemed sensible to just bite the bullet and get my Spice Girls collection back to a more current state. 

And then somehow this has segued into me listening to Kiss?

Jim Kelly June Jamboree: Hot Potato (1975)

THE MOVIE
A US Senator's daughter has been kidnapped in a place called Chang-Lon, by a madman called Carter Rangoon. He's crazy, but wise: "A long journey begins - not ends - with the first step". 

Some army dude spends 6 minutes on the phone to the Senator reassuring him that they have it under control and are sending their best men. He hangs up the phone and asks the other army people where Chang-Lon is. COMEDY

Anyways, the only man that can take this job is Jones. And yes, it's my main man Jim Kelly.

And this time he's hanging out with a lot of white people; including his partner Johnny Chicago. When did Jones need a fucking partner? Or white people in his life that weren't just there to get karate kicked in the junk? Johnny Chicago complains about his payment for this job. Repeatedly. Jones and Chicago meet up with their contact in Thailand - a Chinese woman who happens to be from the army or something, because they spend the rest of the movie calling her "Sarge". But that doesn't matter right now, because of course they mistake her for a prostitute - because she's Asian, get it? MORE COMEDY.

Meanwhile, Carter Rangoon is spouting off all sorts of proverbs like he's Roger Moore in Spice World. He's kinda dressed like him too. "Necessity, besides being the mother of invention, can also be the wife of deception." His plan is to keep the Senator's daughter and let the good guys capture some other girl that looks exactly like her. I have no idea why. But he has pet tigers that eat people who don't get his metaphors and life-lessons, so he's got that going for him.

Before going to rescue the girl, they go pick up the last member of their bad comedy troupe team, a big fat disgusting white dude called White Rhino, or Leonardo. Or I give no fucks. He's having an eating competition against a chubby lady, and he wins by eating mashed potatoes from his hands. Look, if you wanna be fat - be fat. But at least have some fucking hygiene and use eating utensils. Of course, this makes him irresistible to women. MORE FUCKING COMEDY.

So the "good guys" turn up to Rangoon's compound and proceed to take part in the worst fucking movie fight scene I have ever seen, take the fake Senator's daughter, and make a break for it. However, Jones feels the whole thing was too easy, so now he's suspicious. Too easy? Y'all fought like 100 men and broke down their compound with a herd of Elephants. After they leave, Rangoon discovers that the fake Senator's daughter actually stole some important documents from him, so he sends his men to kill her. So... you didn't need to send a double at all? And being attacked constantly in the jungle just makes Jones more suspicious. 

Standard jungle villain attire...

And then out of nowhere, Johnny Chicago tells Jones he's falling in love with the Senator's daughter. Like, I don't even think I've seen them have a conversation? And Jones and "Sarge" are falling in love, despite the only stuff they've talked about is how much they don't trust the Senator's daughter? Also, there is more COMEDY with Leonardo the Rhino being a fat piece of shit, but honestly, fuck that right now.

Eventually, Rangoon catches up with our "heroes" and kills the fake Senator's daughter and then tells them all she was a fraud. Or she admitted to it. Like it matters - bitch is dead and Johnny Chicago is heartbroken. After another riddle to make them rethink what they know about the universe, he takes them back to his compound where they must defeat his men and escape with the real Senator's daughter. Or listen to more nonsense proverbs about listening with no ears, I guess.

REACTION

This was the whitest movie Jim Kelly made. True story; at one point, I put down my hot chocolate and yelled at the no one around that I had had enough. I checked the display and only 16 minutes had passed. So much of it was supposed to be funny, but really none of it was. It was just slapstick nonsense and bad acting and bad everything. Carter Rangoon and his madcap proverbs of nonsense were actually entertaining, I will give it that, but Rhino and Johnny bickering about hats and pay and other stupid shit just made me long for the days when I was watching Three the Hard Way. The only actual moments of humour involved people speaking in random Asian languages and Sarge translating them entirely ridiculously; e.g. some old lady said to them "気をつけてね" and Sarge translated that as the old lady telling Rhino he looked like elephant in lingerie or something. But that's probably only funny if you understand what all these people are saying in the first place, so unless you understand Japanese, Thai, Cantonese and Mandarin, these jokes aren't going to work for you.

JIM KELLY

This pains me to say, but this was my man's worst performance to date. That's not to say it is all on him; he wasn't really the leading man - it was more of an ensemble of shit that drove the movie - and he wasn't given anything good to work with here. His job seemed to be just walking around, talking to Sarge and making a few innuendoes here and there. Most of the "story" seemed to revolve around the fucking fat dude and his storing of food in his clothes and being attractive to women. Because that is COMEDY.

It's bizarre; this movie was written by the same guys that wrote Black Belt Jones and is clearly designed to be a sequel, yet it lacks absolutely everything that made Black Belt Jones so awesome. I would recommend never watching this movie. Never. Ever. Never ever never.