2025 in 2025: Day 172

Super Trouper - ABBA

ABBA come storming into the 80s with a gem of a pop album; big synth bass, funky grooves, killer hooks, disco beats, amazing vocals... Could have done with more disco grooves, but ABBA gots to pay the bills and no one did pop like them.

Highlights: On and On and On, Super Trouper, The Winner Takes It All, Lay All Your Love On Me

8/10

Supergrass - Supergrass

Standard late-90s Supergrass rocking out. Not their best work and I have never gotten the hype for Pumping on Your Stereo, but is is still pretty decent enough. One of those random albums where the second half is way better than the first.

Highlights: Moving, Mary, Jesus Came From Outer Space, Faraway

7/10

SUPERIORITY - 我儘ラキア

This is very solid alt. idol coolness; fairly heavy in parts, but one of the best tracks is just straight-up hip-hop. I highly rate the leader/main singer and hope she has some success now they have disbanded.

Highlights: JOKER, GIRLS, JOURNEY, FUTURES

9/10

Superman and Other Galactic Heroes - Meco

The Superman theme is the best superhero theme and giving it the disco treatment makes it even more heroic. I am not convinced these Batman themes are from anything other than Meco's imagination, but someone should make a disco Batman movie and use them accordingly.

Highlights: Themes from "Superman", The Caped Crusader, The Boy Wonder

7/10

The Supersonic Storybook - Urge Overkill

Urge Overkill and Butch Vig in their indie days. Not nearly as fun as any of their major label stuff, but still interesting and Theme from Navajo features one heck of a heavy riff.

Highlights: The Kids are Insane, Bionic Revolution, (Today Is) Blackie's Birthday, Theme from Navajo

7/10

Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie - Alanis Morissette

Dark. Industrial influence. Introspective. A lot of weird-ass storytelling. Lacking the angst and pop rock of Jagged Little Pill - which is probably why it was viewed as such a poor follow-up. But not by LOGMAN; this is what made me a fan! Cut the last few songs and it would be perfect!

Highlights: I Was Hoping, Joining You, Unsent, That I Would Be Good

8/10

Surfacing - Sarah McLachlan

This is probably peak Felicity material right here. The Sarah McLachlan Theory remains one of the hallmarks of USian television moments and I should revisit it to understand what this album means in that context... *edit* 

Highlights: Building a Mystery, Do What You Have to Do, Adia, Angel

7/10

Surrender - The Chemical Brothers

Banging dance groove after banging dance groove. Nothing as groundbreaking as you would find on Come With Us or Dig Your Own Hole, but there never a dull moment on this album and the guests are all cool. That breakdown in Out of Control is the more New Order than 2025 New Order would ever dream of.

Highlights: Let Forever Be, Out of Control, Under the Influence, Dream On

8.5/10

Swagger - Gun

Fairly standard mid-90s rock, if not a little hair metal flavoured - so not so standard? Also the greatest cover of Word Up! on the planet. 

Highlights: Word Up!, Don't Say It's Over, One Reason, Stand in Line

7/10

Sweat - Nelly

More club dance jams with Nelly counting his money and showing off his money and then him and his crew bragging they get ladies for free - even though they have a lot of money. I bet listening to this album makes Nelly sad now. Random Missy collab sighting!

Highlights: River Don't Run, Heart of a Champion, Tilt Ya Head Back, Another One

7/10

Sweat (Snoop Dogg vs. David Guetta) [Remix] - Snoop Dogg & David Guetta

This is like one of those interviews that has been turned into an autotune song, although those are intentionally funny?

3/10

Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This) - Eurythmics

Peak minimalist dark synth wave 80s new romantic pop, right here. Just a drum machine and some funky bass lines and A LOT of reverb.

Highlights: Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This), Somebody Told Me, Wrap It Up, This City Never Sleeps

7.5/10

Sweet Summer Sun, Live in Hyde Park 2013 (Live) - The Rolling Stones

This was some live EP that I think iTunes gave away. Remember when they used to give away music and movies around Xmas? Man, life was good!

Highlights: Tumbling Dice (Live), Beast of Burden (Live)

7/10

Sweetfish - Dead Flowers

A bit of an improvement in production over their first album, but some of it still sounds very much like mid-90s NZ alt rock. But there are some cool riffs and melodies and songs in here. I actually used to do a bunch of these songs when busking.

Highlights: Shades, Slumber, Home, Same Same

7/10

Swingshift - Cold Chisel

Another live album from these rockers. A bit less of the bigger hits here and lots of feedback instead. Barnesy sounds great for the most part - Cheap Wine almost sounds angry!

Highlights: Cheap Wine, Goodbye (Astrid Goodbye), Star Hotel, Rising Sun

7/10

Synkronized - Jamiroquai

The start of 'new' Jamiroquai. It has the distinction of having a couple of absolutely killer funky tracks, and the rest of completely underwhelming.

Highlights: Canned Heat, Black Capricorn Day, Planet Home, Soul Education

7/10

"Albums" listened to so far: 1656

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2025 in 2025: Day 155

Remember you - Ayumi Hamasaki

Ayu getting some edge and telling her haters to Fuck Off. Quite literally. It is funny; I tend to get in my head that this album is not great, but actually it kind of is? And even if it is not, VIBEES is possibly a top ten sexy bitch track if ever I heard one. I could genuinely listen to that all day.

Highlights: VIBEES, 23rd Monster, (NOT) Remember you, Dreamed a Dream

7.5/10

Remixes 1982-1990 - The Cure

This is actually somewhat of an interesting compilation. The extended mixes are basically the same songs with unnecessarily long intros, which kind of works with Pictures of You (at least this is actually extended this time - by all of 30 seconds). But why can we not get the normal 'New Vocal' mix of Boys Don't Cry, when he is happy to give us the remix version? 

Highlights: Pictures of You (Extended Version 1990), Primary (Red Mix 1990), Close to Me (Extended Mix 1985), Boys Don't Cry (New Voice Club Mix 1986)

7/10

Renegades - Rage Against the Machine

Kind of proof of my whole 'just do one album and bounce' theory with these guys. They could have just recorded all these covers as The Renegades or something, maybe brought in Chuck D to help out? Because these dudes turning all these hip-hop songs in to heavy rock is pretty darn dope.

Highlights: Pistol Grip Pump, How I Could Just Kill a Man, Renegades of Funk, Maggie's Farm

7/10

Republica - Republica

Haha this is so dated - sounds even older than it actually is, like early 90s techno mixed with Britpop or something. So it kind of sounds like 1999 J-Pop. Holy cow that original version of Ready to Go is surprisingly terrible!

Highlights: Drop Dead Gorgeous, Ready to Go (U.S. Mix), Holly

6/10

Return Of The Bumpasaurus - Sir Mix-A-Lot

Oh man, 90s hip-hop really was rife with homophobia and transphobia. And monstrous bass.

Highlights: Aunt Thomasina, You Can Have Her, Jump On It, Funk For Da Blvd.

6/10

Return of the Champions - Queen + Paul Rodgers

I have no issue with Queen bringing in Paul Rodgers; Brian May and Roger Taylor clearly wanted to get back to performing together and these guys made a decent enough album together. It just sometimes Rodgers' voice does not quite suit the classic Queen songs. Some of them he really does! Not even Brian May's massive guitar can save Feel Like Makin' Love from sounding super country. 

Highlights: Radio Ga Ga, 39, I'm In Love With My Car, These Are the Days of Our Lives

7/10

Return of the Space Cowboy - Jamiroquai

Old school funk acid jazz. This is the kind of album that makes me wish I was a better bass player, because Stuart Zender is the man!

Highlights: Light Years, Just Another Story, Manifest Destiny, Space Cowboy

7/10

Revenge - Kiss

Hand down the best 90s album from Kiss. Featuring the best song of the 90s by any band? Rock out with your socks out!

Highlights: God Gave Rock & Roll to You, Spit, Thou Shalt Not, I Just Wanna

8/10

Revenge - Eurythmics

Imagine if these were the same songs... This album starts off absolutely massive - Missionary Man may be one of the greatest ways to start an album in 1986* - then kind of loses steam in the second half. But is still probably my favourite Eurythmics album.

Highlights: Missionary Man, When Tomorrow Comes, Thorn in My Side, The Last Time

7.5/10

*I decided to check and I may be right - I can see only 1 other challenger for that, being Let It Rock from Bon Jovi's Slippery When Wet

Revolution - Kara

Let's play random K-Pop song of the day! This time it is Mr. by Kara? It is fun; very big upbeat dance pop.

8/10

Revolver - The Beatles

Like Sgt. Pepper's, this album always has dorks saying it is the greatest album, or it is a perfect album, or other such nonsense. It is neither. Because Paul McCartney's songs on this album are mostly trash.

Highlights: Tomorrow Never Knows, And Your Bird Can Sing, I Want to Tell You, Eleanor Rigby

7/10

Revolverlution - Public Enemy

This is purely the title track. I really do not have much Public Enemy and I should probably feel too ashamed to show my face on the internet again.

8/10

Rhythm & Gangsta - Snoop Dogg

This only the single Signs with Justin Timberlake. It is probably the last good song this dude released - more than 20 years ago.

8/10

Ricky Martin - Ricky Martin

The best Ricky Martin songs are when he is just shaking those hips and making you boogie, but sadly most of this album is ballads. Which are mostly kind of meh.

Highlights: Livin' La Vida Loca, Private Emotion, Bella (She's All I Ever Had), I Count the Minutes

7/10

The Riddle - Nik Kershaw

I loved the 1966 Batman TV show as a kid. I still do - rewatched it a few years ago and had the time of my life. I recall this video had something with that version of The Riddler going on in it? I cannot recall if it scared me or just made me like the video.

8/10

"Albums" listened to so far: 1425

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2025 in 2025: Day 58

Doo-Wops & Hooligans - Bruno Mars

Hikola: Bruno Mars is great!

LOGMAN: Yeah, he's the man!

Hikola: *checks my iTunes to put on some Bruno Mars* Ummm you only have 1 song of his? And you're telling me he's the man?

LOGMAN: Yeah, he's the man!

Hikola: You have so much rubbish on here that you hate, yet this guy is "the man" and you only have 1 song??

LOGMAN: Yeah, he's the man!

Hikola: Get some more Bruno Mars, would you?!?

LOGMAN: Yeah, he's the man!

10/10

Dookie - Green Day

Kids these days with this sanitised version of Green Day don't know what it was like in 1994 to hear Basketcase for the first time. Or get this album and realise that pop-punk is the future. I used to busk like 90% of this album. And listening to this now makes me really appreciate how much I just made up half the lyrics to some of these songs. Also, my friends in 1994 thought I was dumb for liking this album. Then When I Come Around hit the radio and everyone wanted to borrow my CD. It's tough being more awesome than everyone else...

Highlights: Lowlights might be easier?

9.5/10

Doolittle - Pixies

Are these cats like the godfathers of grunge or something? This album is hilarious; for every great song, there is an almost unlistenable few minutes of dirge that barely resembles a song. No. 13 Baby is not in fact the child of ELLEGARDEN's No. 13. Non-pretentious non-grunge LOGMAN is less than impressed.

Highlights: Debaser, Wave of Mutilation, Here Comes Your Man, Monkey Gone to Heaven

5/10

Dopamine - Third Eye Blind

When this came out, like most Third Eye Blind, I listened a lot. A LOT. So much, in fact, that two songs from it are still in my Top 25 Most Played playlist - and that is without listening to the album since 2017. Seriously. I have actively avoided it for five years now. Everything Is Easy sounds like The Cure musically. In fact, I would argue that this whole album is heavily influenced by both 80s New Wave and the music of 2015 - which also heavily borrowed from 80s New Wave. Here's to another five years...

Highlights: Shipboard Cook, Back to Zero, Something in You, Get Me out of Here, Say It

9/10

Double Fantasy - John Lennon & Yoko Ono

The contrast on this album is made less obvious by having John and Yoko trade songs. And that is one reason the album works - if they had done something like Side A = John, Side B = Yoko, it would have been one side of standard rock'n roll and then one side of provocative new wave. But mixing them together actually makes it more cohesive, to me. One day I will check out the Stripped version of this album. One day...

Highlights: Watching the Wheels, Cleanup Time, Woman, Hard Times Are Over

7/10

Double Happiness - Jimmy Barnes

This is Barnesy doing duets with a bunch of Australian artists I do not know. And a few I do. Like The Living End - that is a great combo! Bah gawd I will always get chills when Jimmy Barnes screams those crazy high notes, like on What Will They Say. The man is a true one-of-a-kind. Even when doing hip-hop.

Highlights: What Will They Say, Gonna Take Some Time, Resurrection Shuffle, Higher

7/10

Double Platinum - Kiss

Oh, this album again! Kiss trying to make things more interesting, but just making things silly?

Highlights: Strutter '78, Calling Dr. Love, Rock Bottom (Intro)/She

8/10

Down To The Promised Land: 5 Years of Bloodshot Records - Various Artists

This is purely Monday Night by Ryan Adams. It is a very good song!

9/10

Down With The King - Run-D.M.C.

The Kings are back! With some proper hip-hop guests like Pete Rock and A Tribe Called Quest and Onyx. And even Tom Morello! And some disses at MC Hammer. Come on, guys - can't we all just get along? Run even says that exact line on In The House, so why is he starting trouble with a fellow man of god? This whole album hits HARD and it is glorious.

Highlights: Down With The King, Come On Everybody, Can I Get It Yo, Ooh Watcha Gonna Do, In the House, Get Open, Wreck Shop

9/10

Dr. Dolittle 2: Original Soundtrack - Various Artists

Of course this is not the whole thing - simply Do U Wanna Roll (Dolittle Theme) by Snoop Dogg, R.L. and Lil' Kim. This is one of the coolest singles Snoop Dogg has done since Doggystyle. It is at least better than anything he did at WrestleMania?

8/10

Dr. Feelgood - Mötley Crüe
This album is the business. The title track is just badass. Slice of Your Pie is also fairly badass. Complete with an outro from The Beatles and Bryan Adams singing backing vocals. Seriously. Reminds me of when Kiss enlisted his help to make their most rocking album after making some dire stuff on their own. BRYAN ADAMS IS THE FIXER! Man, the production on this album is just off the charts. Kickstart My Heart may well be the greatest 80's rock song of the 80's. I've always liked Same Ol' Situation (S.O.S.), but I probably liked it more when I was younger and had no idea what was going on with the lyrics - now it just seems like some adolescent male fantasy. Sticky Sweet is kinda more of the same. And while She Goes Down just continues that lyrically, musically it is just so badass I don't care. Then we finish things off with another couple of power ballads - Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away) and Time For Change. Peak Crüe, right here.
Highlights: The Whole Damn Thing

10/10

Draw The Line - Aerosmith

Wasn't I just lamenting the fact that I have not had much Aerosmith come up? Well, looks like I spoke too soon, or something, because here is some more 70s Aerosmith in my face. It is fairly standard 70s Aerosmith. Which is fun.

Highlights: I Wanna Know Why, Get It Up, Bright Light Fright, Sight for Sore Eyes

7/10

Dream Days at the Hotel Existence - Powderfinger

This is one of those albums where I have no explanation as to how or why I have it. Some of their songs can rock pretty well and definitely show some of that fire, but the ballads are pretty meh, to me. Otherwise, it is fine.

Highlights: Head Up in the Clouds, Who Really Cares, Surviving, Ballad of a Dead Man

6.5/10

"Albums" listened to so far: 461

2025 in 2025: Day 56

Dissident/Live in Atlanta - Pearl Jam

This is such a weird release; they released 3 different versions of the singles - each one with a different selection of live songs from the same concert, and this is basically the 3 singles compiled in to one box set to get almost the full live concert. Pretty dumb to cut out Sonic Reducer. And some of the editing is... questionable. But it is all but one song each from both Ten and Vs, so the songs are solid. And decent enough performances. I know Pearl Jam had some better shows, but this is fine. Makes me somewhat look forward to listening to Ten and Vs... in, like, 6 months...

Highlights: Dissident [Studio Version], W.M.A.

8/10

The Distance to Here - Live

I once gave an acoustic performance of The Dolphin's Cry (just me and a friend on acoustic bass) and I can honestly say it was one of my most memorable performances. I want to do that again. I saw these dudes on tour for this album; in one of the most confusing combinations, Stabbing Westward were the opening act - which should explain to you, reader, why LOGMAN went to this concert. I mean, I do not hate Live or anything (it would be strange if I did, considering I have three of their albums in my iTunes library), but they are not exactly a band that I was ever clamouring to see live. I would, however, beat the snot out of your children to see Stabbing Westward live again.

Highlights: The Dolphin's Cry, They Stood Up for Love, Sparkle, We Walk in the Dream

7/10

DIStopping - Charisma.com

Have I mentioned how much I dig this group? Because this album is flat out good stuff; big beats, cool rapping and sweet production.

Highlights: スーパーガール, ペインオフ, 100%ブービー

8.5/10

Distortion - Rev Run

This is interesting; Run not only just recycles some of his classic rhymes and rhythms, he also samples Sweet Home Alabama - which I'm pretty sure they did on Crown Royal. At least here it is better, because this is just Run being Run, instead of playing second fiddle to a bunch of dorks. Run turns it up to 11 by sampling God of Thunder, and then Joan Jett's I Love Rock'n Roll. Run-D.M.C. and Joan Jett is the combo I didn't know I wanted in 1986.

Highlights: Mind on the Road, Distortion, I Used to Think I Was Run

8/10

Divine Madness - Madness

Madness were one of those bands that I thought were super fun when I was a kid, without actually listening to much of their music. And that all still tracks today, because there are only two songs here.

Highlights: House of Fun, Our House

8/10

Divinyls - Divinyls

This is purely I Touch Myself. I did not get this song at all when I was young. Then it was used in the film Austin Powers, and it just clicked for me; now I consider it an extremely well-crafted pop-rock song. That hook is unbeatable.

10/10

Dizzy Up The Girl - Goo Goo Dolls

Oh boy, I loved this album and this band. Slide is a perfect song for busking - I actually forgot I used to do this song and that the guitar work in it is really fun. Hard to believe these guys were full on dirty indie garage rock before making it big. We (my BFF and I) both hated the bass player back then, but I've grown up and actually totally dig his songs a lot now - even if I do still think his voice is nowhere near as good John Rzeznik's.

Highlights: Dizzy, Slide, Black Balloon, All Eyes On Me, Iris, Hate This Place

8/10

Do I Wait/Darkness [Early NYC Versions] - Ryan Adams

More Ryan Adams singles. I read today he had another meltdown on stage, but this one at least seems to be justified. Anyways, this version of Do I Wait is amazing. 

Highlights: Do I Wait

8/10

Do What U Want [feat. Christina Aguilera - Single] - Lady Gaga

Instead of scrapping this song and hiding it from the world because of R. Kelly, the album should just replace it with this version. Because who doesn't want to hear these divas belting out a sexy tune together?

10/10

Do You Laugh When You Lie? (Pax Am Singles Series, Vol.4) [Single] - Ryan Adams

More Ryan Adams channeling his 80s influences - this time in a kind of R.E.M. college radio vibe. And an acoustic number.

Highlights: By the Way

6.5/10

Doggystyle - Snoop Dogg

Absolute bonafide hip-hop classic. I am pretty sure back in the day this was the only hip-hop album we would listen to, because nothing came close to being as cool. And most of my crew were skate punks, so gangster rap wasn't their total jam. Somehow I find the G-Funk crew rapping about sex far less offensive than one would think. Especially considering the way they rap out it. How great was Kurupt? Whatever happened to that him?? Warren G always was and always will be a very cool dude. Holy balls Gz and Hustlas is funky as hell. 

Highlights: Gin & Juice, Serial Killa, Ain't No Fun, Gz and Hustlas

8/10

"Albums" listened to so far: 438

WrestleMania Easter Extravaganza: WrestleMania XXXIX, Night Two

2 April 2023

So-Fi Stadium
Inglewood, California - USA

Attendance: 67,553

Commentators: Michael Cole & Corey Graves

My thoughts before this viewing:
As mentioned yesterday (3 hours ago), when they ran down the card for this show, I was actually filled with hope. And jealousy. Because I think I may actually give a hoot about some of these matches. And all the worst people were part of night one. Except The Miz is still hosting. But, again, I will take that over him actually wrestling.

America The Beautiful
Jimmie Allen is somebody that I've never known. And he really dressed up for the occasion.

He just grooves on his own for a little bit and, hey, at least he sang the ending well?
5/10

Opening Video Package
Kevin Hart is back... in a bath robe.

Tonight is "more star power". No shit - Austin Theory and Brock Lesnar are not the same. Also, this is not a sequel; the first time they did "WrestleMania Hollywood" was WrestleMania XXI, so at this point it is more of a trilogy.

It's The fucking Miz and Snoop Dogg the WWE Marijuana Champion? The Miz does his arm thing again and just looks genuinely awkward. And shit.

Opening Match
Brock Lesnar vs Omos (w/MVP)

Omos just throws Lesnar around and it is fantastic! He eventually makes a mistake, so Lesnar takes him to suplex city.

Winner = Brock Lesnar via pinfall following an F5
6/10

Maaaan that was too quick!

WWE Shop offer free shipping again - they said it was yesterday only, so their shop lies as well? It's like they're not even trying anymore, but hey, neither am I!

Big E is still stuck at the vending machine.

Who plays these shitty WWE video games? I'll stick to WCW Backstage Assault, thank you very muchly.

"WrestleMania Showcase Fatal Four-Way Tag-Team"
Liv Morgan & Raquel Rodriguez vs Shotzi & Natalya vs Chelsea Green & Sonya Deville vs 'Rowdy' Ronda Rousey & Shayna Baszler

Liv has yet another new tag-team partner at WrestleMania. Wow, Rousey has really fallen off, huh? I don't think this Raquel is related to Rogan. Everyone is scared of her and she just laughably shrugs off a dropkick. Natalya goes for the double Sharpshooter. Where have Rousey and Baszler been? Because they sure haven't been in this match - they haven't even been on the apron awaiting a tag or anything. And why is Baszler missing a boot??

Winners = 'Rowdy' Ronda Rousey & Shayna Baszler via submission (Rousey with an armbar on Shotzi)
5/10

Rousey and Baszler celebrate for longer than they were in the match.

Video Package
More bullshit about Dominik Mysterios bad new friends. They used to hang out with Edge? Oh, wait - I think this is that faction they kinda started at WrestleMania XXXIX - so when I predicted they wouldn't be together by the next WrestleMania, I was kinda right - because they gave Edge the boot. Fair enough, he is old and boring.
5/10

Highlight of the Night again? The last one had zero to do with this actual night... and neither does this one! Bobby Lashley threw some fat dude out of the ring and won the Andre The Giant Battle Royal. And now he's on the stage to show off his trophy. Usually that would be the prelude to someone coming out and trashing it... but nope, this is just Lashley waving and holding his trophy like a dork. Corey Graves pretends this is some sort of amazing achievement that will only further Lashley's career. I think I will never hear this mentioned again... possibly because I don't watch WWE outside of WrestleMania...

Xavier Woods and his band of dorks run another video game simulation for the next match. If this were WCW Backstage Assault, I would just play as La Parka and beat their asses with a chair. Or a flaming 2x4.

Video Package
Some German dude has been whooping people and is now the Intercontinental Champion. Sheamus wants to challenge him. Drew McIntyre... has a sword. So it's a battle of the European dudes. Except it seems a bit more about Sheamus and McIntyre than the champion.
5/10

Titus is back on commentary for another round of impersonating Dusty Rhodes and I'm here for it.

Oh shit, more commercials? This particular match gets its own sponsor??

WWE Intercontinental Championship
Triple Threat
Drew McIntyre vs Sheamus vs Gunther (c)
I think this is first I'm seeing of the new Intercontinental belt. Or I just haven't been paying attention - which is VERY possible. Gunther delivers some massive chops and they just look hilarious on Sheamus. Then Gunther and McIntyre have a full-on chop battle. Chops and slaps for everyone! Sheamus pounds on McIntyre so much he looks gassed! Sheamus has it won, but McIntyre interferes. Gunther powerbombs Sheamus on to McIntyre and then powerbombs McIntyre for fun!

Winner = Gunther via pinfall following powerbombs for both Sheamus and Drew McIntyre. Equal opportunity powerbombs!
8/10

Bah gawd that was physical - almost to the point of being uncomfortable, but not quite, so it was just awesome. The commentators give it a standing ovation.

The Miz pays children to like him. Creepy.

WWE exploiting kids and stuff again.

Video Package
Bianca Belair won the title at the previous WrestleMania. And the two before that, but they don't seem to want to mention those. Asuka has new facepaint. And they show fans booing her, so we all know she is the villain here.
4/10

Raw Women's Championship
Bianca Belair (c) vs Asuka
Asuka never wins at WrestleMania, so I think Belair is in for a longer title reign. The really should hire a Japanese artist to perform Asuka's entrance theme. Or just get the rights to Rule by Ayumi Hamasaki. Belair keeps the night's theme of 'children are cheap labour' by having a bunch of kids dancing during her entrance. And holy shit the commentators have listened to me and are shutting the fuck up during these entrances! Asuka hits a whole lots of spinning shit. Belair is strong! Asuka misses the mist and gets an armbar, but yeah Belair is strong.

Winner = Bianca Belair via pinfall following her KOD or whatever it is called
7/10

Asuka's WrestleMania losing streak continues! She must surely be close to Big Show's record by now.

Alpha Academy are much less interesting than a chocolate bar.

Recap of the main event last night, because The Usos actually losing a match at WrestleMania is wildly unbelievable.

Things have been going well, so now it's time for The Miz and Snoop Dogg. They are trying to claim both nights attendance as one total, but I would guess 90% of the people here tonight were here yesterday. I mean, some of these dudes in the front row haven't even changed their clothes. The Miz bitches at Snoop Dogg about having to wrestle Pat McAfee... and it sounds like Snoop Dogg is going to make him wrestle again?

Shane McMahon vs The Miz
BAHAHAHAHA Shane immediately blows his knee attempting a leap frog.

No contest?

Snoop Dogg is pissed and takes it out on The Miz. Oh, now it's really on...

Snoop Dogg vs The Miz
A "People's Elbow" so hilarious, I can hear those wacky Germans laughing at 4am from the other side of the world. And a year in the past...

Winner = Snoop Dogg via pinfall following Snoopy's elbow?
10/10 no notes

Video Package
Edge worked his way to the top by being a total dick? Then he retired due to injury. He was a dick, so that's what you get. Finn Balor rose up in his place, or something. Edge came back after 9 years and claimed he was a better man, but he formed this Judgment Day group and they are bad guys. So bad, they turned on Edge. Rhea Ripley beat up Edge's wife. So why is Edge so mad at Balor? Why isn't he fighting Ripley?? The narrative here was all over the place.
2/10

Hell in a Cell
Edge vs Finn Balor
Trying to make an entrance all spooky with candles and shit does not work when doing it during the day time. Oh, wait - it's a tie-in for a fucking movie. WCW did this shit as well. Edge is disco gimp??

He's wearing a jacket with the old 'The Brood' logo and Cole says they debuted in 1997. Considering Edge debuted months before the rest of The Brood and he himself didn't debut until WrestleMania XIV in 1998, you can fuck off with your misinformation. Immediately with the weapons and Balor just no sells chair shots. Edge apparently regrets forming Judgment Day and now wants to make up for it by destroying his creation - just like Ted Dibiase and the NWO. More weapons. These painted kendo sticks look like folded drinks umbrellas. The crowd call for tables, because they are clearly invested in this story. Balor is leaking blood, so the match stops? And we switch to a wide shot so the viewers can't see him being tended to by a doctor. That's actually lamer than in WCW. Edge kills time during this break by looking for more weapons and then doing nothing with them. The match resumes... Balor makes noises like he's the fucking Tasmanian Devil. He lays Edge on a table and bahahaha it immediately splits perfectly in the middle.

Winner = Edge via pinfall following a con-chair-to
5/10

That was fucking silly. And pausing the match to tend to a cut completely killed any momentum it might have been gaining. Edge should go talk to Bret Hart about how great his match with 'Rowdy' Roddy Piper would have been if they had stopped it to clean up his blood.

Montage of WWE doucheburgers re-enacting famous scenes from various movies. Hold up; one of these dudes drops an F-bomb, but blood in a wrestling match is not allowed?!?!

Backstage Interview
Kayla still works here! Bianca Belair is partying with little children. Find some friends your own age!

Backlash. Bad Bunny. Boring.

Hall of Fame: Class of 2023
This year's inductees were Stacey Kiebler and Andy Kaufman. Obviously there were young girls in attendance, because Jerry 'the King' Lawler had to provide his speech via online. The Great Muta was inducted - despite never wrestling for WWE - as well as.. a referee? Oh, and Rey Mysterio. But not Rey Mysterio, Jr.? He was awesome in WCW. And that Adidas suit is something.

WrestleMania XL will always be sunny in Philadelphia.

More highlights of night one, like I didn't already watch that shit.

The Miz thinks you should gamble.

The Weeknd are still providing WrestleMania theme songs. And they are still terrible.

Do the Safety Dance in jail after you fail to do your taxes properly?

No wonder this company makes so much money they have to cut people due to budget cuts...

Video Package
Cody Rhodes has wanted to be WWE Champion since he was 8 years old and now he is going to finish his story. So he'll win and then die?? You know, all weekend these pre-match videos have been providing all sorts of backstory and helping the casual viewer (e.g. LOGMAN) informed of the story behind the matches. But then when it comes to the main event, they tell us absolutely nothing. That's the WWE I know!
6/10

Main Event
Undisputed WWE Championship
Cody Rhodes vs Roman Reigns (c) (w/Paul Heyman and some other dude named Solo?)
Reigns is introduced by... pianists? Michael Cole hilariously mocks Cody Rhodes for failing to become an actor when he was younger. And then he goes on to bag on The American Dream for never winning the WWE Heavyweight Championship. I mean, he came to the WWF for a grand total of 18 months in the midst of Hulkamania and was stuck feuding with the likes of Big Bossman and Honky Tonk Man. Hardly the respect a multiple-time NWA Heavyweight World Champion deserved. Paul Heyman babbles something about Roman Reigns "owning an island of relevancy". Honestly sounds like something Roger Moore would have said in Spice World. Haha what the commentators are impressed Rhodes knows the rules. Reigns dominates forever, until Rhodes eventually gets some offense and Cole is all like 'Wow, he's not just going to get smoked like a chump!' Ham Solo gets ejected from the match, but why do they bother agreeing to it? If they disqualify Reigns, he would still be champion. Rhodes hits a Crossroads and not even Heyman can pretend that was getting a three-count. Graves calls Reigns a "great white shark". Racist! Aaand here come the finishers! Reigns goes for a guillotine off his back and I'm pretty sure his shoulders were down for like a twenty-count. It's the main event at WrestleMania, so of course that means we gotta have the referee knocked out! Cole acts like it has never happened before. Well, allow me to check my notes...

*checks notes*

It's happened in the last 50 main events. Fuck you. The Usos run in and hit some superkicks and their Dudley Boys rip-off finisher. So Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens Mac chase them off. Rhodes recovers and hits a bunch of Crossroads... so Ham Solo comes back and murders Rhodes or something.

Winner = Roman Reigns via pinfall following a spear
6/10

If the referee was actually competent, he would have realised Ham Solo had disobeyed his order to leave the ringside and reversed his decision. And THAT would have been a fitting tribute to Dusty Rhodes!

I'll be honest; I knew the result of this and that probably hampered my enjoyment of the match. Michael Cole calls this the greatest title reign of all-time. HAHAHAHAHA no.

We get fan reactions and then it's pyro and posing and peace out!

WrestleMania XXXIX, Night Two: The Awards

1. Best Match
   Drew McIntyre vs Sheamus vs Gunther
   Very physical and very fun!
   
2. Worst Match
   Edge vs Finn Balor
   Like most Edge matches since he returned, it was slow and not all that exciting.
3. Highlight of the Show
   Snoop Dogg with the worst 'People's Elbow' ever? Shane O'Mac blowing his knee and thus ruining whatever they had planned?
4. Lowlight of the Show
   The Miz as host, although that is better than him wrestling. But then he went and did that, too. Again.
5. Star of the Show
   I mean... there really are no stars here?
6. Best Celebrity Appearance
   Snoop Dogg for doing barely anything and getting some sort of WWE belt out of it. Also, shout out to Rick Rubin for sitting behind the Spanish announce table at some point but obviously not agreeing to be on camera.
7. Worst Celebrity Appearance
   I don't think there were any other celebrities tonight, but Logan Paul was in the highlights from last night, so let's just go with him, because fuck that douche.
8. Tonight's Meal
   Dear readers, I'm not going to lie to you; tonight I went kinda cheap. I had simple wraps of a Hoki filet on spinach with some baba ghanoush and a bit of coleslaw, all in a garlic butter wrap. I wasn't excited for this show, so didn't go all out on the meals this year. But I sure went 200% on the PepsiMax with Raspberry...
9. T-Shirt Cleanliness
   I can't say for certain, but I may have only got a bit of sauce on my sleeve. Which led to a great deal of panic, because this Hart Foundation hockey jersey was far more expensive than that white t-shirt I threw a WrestleMania logo...
10. Overall Score
    That was a WrestleMania! I had a nap after day one and a whole bottle of Pepsi, so maybe that helped my attitude, but there was genuinely not a bad match and some really fun ones to boot. As always, the skits and ads and hosts were fucking awful, and having the bad guy win the main event is kind of a downer, but otherwise this was probably the best WrestleMania I have watched in years.
    7 out of 10

WrestleMania Easter Extravaganza: WrestleMania XXXIX, Night One

1 April 2023

So-Fi Stadium
Inglewood, California - USA

Attendance: 67,303

Commentators: Michael Cole & Corey Graves

My thoughts before this viewing:
I have only just started watching WCW in 1998, so what better time for a trip to 25 years in the future (or one year in the past) and watch last year's WrestleMania? Cody Rhodes is here to follow his Father's dream... of losing to Roman Reigns at WrestleMania, or something. And that's about all I know. And I care about even less. But, it is Good Friday so let's watch some WrestleMania and make it a Bad Friday...

NIGHT ONE

America The Beautiful
Becky G is here to sing the song today. She once did a cool song with J-Hope. This is not that song.
5/10

Opening Video Package
Kevin Hart is our host? Oh, no - he is just presenting this video. WrestleMania is a Once Upon a Time in Hollywood story... which makes no sense, as the first WrestleMania was in New York and Titan's offices are in Connecticut. Maybe Quentin Tarantino is directing this? It's WrestleMania Hollywood again, so the wrestlers have filmed a bunch of classic movie scenes to show off their terrible acting skills again. Fucking kill me now. Bahahahah Kevin Hart says this show has star power "like Austin Theory" - a guy with all the star power of a door knob in Cornwall. 
2/10

Michael Cole welcomes us and aaaaahhhhh fuck The Miz is hosting with Snoop Dogg. Fucking kill me again.

Opening Match
WWE US Championship
John Cena vs Austin Theory (c)
John Cena makes wishes come true for lots of children. Not sure what that has to do with this match; did he refuse to grant Theory's wish? Is Theory uncomfortable with how much WWE like to exploit these sick children? For example, having a bunch of kids on stage for John Cena's introduction. None of them are wearing John Cena t-shirts; in fact, one of them is dressed in a Hulk fucking Hogan costume.

Gosh, Cena is going bald! Theory bites him a few times and Graves writes it off to the referee being lenient because it is WrestleMania. He also thinks there is a possibility that John Cena wins and becomes the US Champion. Of course there is a referee bump and John Cena thinks he has won the match, which means he doesn't.

Winner = Austin Theory via pinfall following some variation of the F5 but with a dumber name
5/10

HHH thinks him in a private plane has everything to do with being a wrestler in a video game.

Shoosh have a chocolate bar.

WWE Shop with the evergreen ugly clothing. This year's WrestleMania special is free shipping? Cheap bastards. 

This year's theme song is AGAIN a shitty song from The Weeknd. Might even be the same shitty song, for all I know. His music sounds like the most generic background music for department stores.

We've had one match and it's already time for the Highlight of the Night? Is it one of the 76 advertisements? Oh, it is something that took place on another show - so it has nothing to do with WrestleMania.

"WrestleMania Showcase Fatal Four-Way Tag-Team"
The Street Profits vs Alpha Academy vs Braun Strowman & Ricohet vs The Viking Raiders (w/Valhalla)

For a moment, I thought The Viking Raiders had the Pepsi logo on their gear. One benefit of posting last year's WrestleMania bLog was that I am coming in to this match actually knowing who Alpha Academy are this time! But still not The Viking Raiders and their non-Pepsi sponsored gear. The Street Profits are still cool. It's crazy that they are never the champions, yet The Usos are always the champions at WrestleMania and have about a 1/5th of the charisma. Strowman runs around the ring doing the worst shoulder tackles I've ever seen. I should add that Titus O'Neal has joined the commentary team for this match and he seems to be channeling Dusty Rhodes. Which makes him the best commentator this company has had in about 20 years. And The Street Profits are still cool.

Winners = The Street Profits via pinfall following cool stuff
6/10

We get some sort of recap of Brock Lesnar's wikpedia page career history. Because tomorrow night Brock Lesnar takes on Omos? Oh, shit - why did I wait a year to watch this?!? Omos is now being billed as 7'3". I'm sure when he first appeared they were billing him as 8 foot or something.

Xavier Woods is backstage with nerds and wrestlers not worthy of a match at WrestleMania. They are running sims on the new WWE video game. But which platform? I want to make fun of this, but I'll take it over more of The Miz.

Video Package
Oh fuck off.
3/10

Seth Rollins vs Logan Paul
Logan Paul copies the Shawn Michaels entrance from WrestleMania XII, except slower and way more lame. Rollins has a conductor to lead the crowd in some chanting or some bullshit, and for the only time in my life I can relate to Logan Paul.

Fuck this. I'm not writing about these turds today.

Winner = Seth Rollins via pinfall following a curb stomp
4/10

Oh there is a WWE Biography show on Dusty Rhodes? Guess what I'll be watching after this bullshit...

Big E can't decide between a Snickers or a Snickers... or a Snickers.

Video Package
Bayley has new friends. Walmart Lady GaGa still sucks and is teaming with older more talented women.
3/10

Becky Lynch, Lita & Trish Stratus vs Damage Ctrl (Bayley, Io Sky and Dakota Kai)
The good team get some kind of wannabe comicbook-style entrance video. Big Time Becks would be a terrible superhero name. This match is pretty much Damage Ctrl beating on Lynch for a while, until Lita gets the tag and it becomes obvious why Lynch was taking most of the match. Stuff happens and everyone hits their finishing maneuvers.

Winners = Becky Lynch, Trish Stratus & Lita via pinfall following something by Becky Lynch that I big time don't care about
5/10

Tomorrow night, Asuka will continue to lose at WrestleMania.

Video Package
Rey Mysterio loves his family, but his son Dominik fell in with a bad crowd and went to jail. They are wrestlers, so Rey should take some of the blame here... Anyways, Dominik did hard time (a whole night?) and that has changed him. He clearly gets his height from Mrs Mysterio, Jr. Rey refused to fight his own son until Dominik... told his Mother... to shut up!
6/10

Bad Bunny is joining the Spanish commentary team. Michael Cole claims this show is a sell out of around 70,000 people, but there sure are a lot of empty seats out there. The hot dog stands must be super busy or something...

Is this supposed to be footage of Dominik in prison? And now he's arriving in a police van, so he is coming direct from prison? Why was he there this time? And why is he now wearing a jacket and mask that he wasn't wearing in the video?

Michael Cole: "This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever witnessed". I appreciate the effort, but you also watched the previous 20-something WrestleManias, so I don't think that is true.

Rey Mysterio vs Dominik Mysterio
Cole claims that Dominik "hasn't earned the right to wear a lucha mask". Yeah - he hasn't eaten the 1kg burrito at Mad Mex! Snoop Dogg is driving Rey to the ring in a Cadillac. To Eddie Guerrero's WWE theme. Just keep on milking it, guys... I've just finished watching 1997 WCW, which is Rey Misterio Jr. at the peak of his career. This is not that. A lot of back and forth, and then back and forth some more. Their family are ringside, so there is family drama. Then more back and forth. Dominik's bad friends come out to help him, so some other dudes in LWO shirts come out to help Rey. Seriously? L fucking W fucking O? I'm about a year away from Eddie Guerrero starting that in WCW, but seriously, are these people just completely devoid of all creativity? Dominik with the slowest 619 I may have ever seen. Honestly, I feel sorry for this kid; when his Dad was his age, he was already a multi-time WCW Cruiserweight champion and had had numerous 5-star matches. And had even lost his mask! In fairness, he had also been a pro for like ten years already as well, but there is no reason Dominik couldn't have learned from his Father and started younger. And gotten better.

Winner = Rey Mysterio via pinfall following a splash
6/10

A group of children were lied to and they had to hang out with The Miz. So torturing regular children is okay, so long as you grant some wishes for sick kids?

Bad Bunny will host the next WWE show that I will never watch.

Why would I care about some people watching this show in Germany at 4am? Did I need to know that Germans are wacky?

Video Package
Rhea Ripley won the Royal Rumble and challenged Charlotte Flair. Didn't that already happen a couple of years ago? Again, nothing original going on here...
2/10

Smackdown Women's Championship
Rhea Ripley vs Charlotte Flair (c)
I think Michael Cole just claimed that Charlotte Flair has more wins at WrestleMania than anyone else in history? Perhaps he meant to say women only? Because Hulk Hogan has won more times than Flair has even appeared. And The Undertaker went like 21-0 or something. Coles mentions something about the "75,000 people in attendance" and I'm impressed the crowd has somehow grown in the last hour. There must be a massive queue for the bathrooms! Maybe there will be 150,000 people buying drinks by the end of the night! Charlotte Flair is 10 years younger than Trish Stratus. Charlotte Flair looks at least 10 years older than Trish Stratus.

Winner = Rhea Ripley via pinfall following a top-rope Rip Tide
4/10

Michael Cole and Corey Graves say this was the greatest match ever. Uhh sure whatever, dudes.

Tomorrow some dudes want to fight over the Intercontinental Championship. Cool.

The Miz announces the attendance has grown even further to reach 80,000! Wow, who would have believed it... He claims he put out an "open challenge" on social media, because he's the toughest man in the building. Dude, you're not even the toughest man in the front row. Pat McAfee comes out and says he couldn't find The Miz's "open challenge" on any of the social media sites, but forgets to list MySpace like a rookie. Cole claims McAfee is undefeated; pretty sure he lost to that old POS and it was embarrassing. Fuckhead. McAfee challenges The Miz to a match because this fucking show hasn't been boring enough. Cole is so excited it's like someone offered him free ice cream for life. McAfee starts a "tiny balls" chant at The Miz. Wait - Snoop Dogg has some WWE belt? And he has the power to make this match official?

Pat McAfee vs The Miz
Corey Graves hates Pat McAfee for some reason. Which is fine, because I hate Corey Graves for all the reasons. The Miz comes off the top rope into a superkick. Some famous guy I don't know - likely sports - attacks The Miz and McAfee doesn't get disqualified. Nice of the Mysterios to give up their seats so this dude could have a whole little section to himself. The crowd give zero fucks about him or this match or any of this.

Winner = Pat McAfee via pinfall following a punt
5/10

The Miz got in zero offence, so maybe this was match of the night...

WrestleMania next year will be in Philadelphia. Sylvester Stallone/Rocky Balboa has got to be making an appearance, right?

They run down the card for tomorrow's (tonight's?) card. Legit looks a million times more interesting than night one.

More advertisements encouraging people to bet on WWE matches. Gambling is bad, yo! And betting on a TV show seems particularly lame.

Video Package
Sami Zayn used to hang out with The Bloodline, which meant he couldn't be friends with Kevin Owens Mac - even though they stopped being friends a couple of WrestleManias ago? But then Zayn turned on The Bloodline to be friends with Kevin Owens Mac again? Cue teen drama music and dialogue about friendships and family (and I mean this literally). It's all kinds of pathetic. BUT at least these fucks are actually using the video packages to tell viewers why the match is happening!
6/10

Musical Performance
Lil' Uzi Vert sounds like a shitty drink from Starbucks. This loser sure ain't no King of Rock.
1/10

Do the safety dance, but not your taxes?

These shitburgers got paid a billion dollars and still fill this fucking show with all the advertisements...

Main Event
Undisputed WWE Tag-Team Championship
Sami Zayn & Kevin Owens Mac vs The Usos (c)
As always, it is WrestleMania and The Usos are tag-team champions. Nothing original. Cole says they have been champions for almost two years now. I find it hard to believe much of what that clown says, but let's pretend for a moment that he is actually correct for once; that would mean The Bloodline have held two world championships and two tag-team championships for two years. Why?? It seems unnecessary. The Hart Foundation were an infinitely better faction and when they held a bunch of titles it was only for a few months. And they held more, because they were better. Usos beat down Zayn to start. And continue. And continue some more. Kevin Owens Mac finally gets the tag, so that means things get a bit more back and forth. And The Usos hit a million superkicks like they think they're The Young Bucks at a superkick party. The Spanish announce table was destroyed earlier in the show - I didn't mention it, because it was meaningless - and now they have a new one, so Kevin Owens Mac tries to put an Uso through it. Which, of course, means Owens Mac is going through a table instead. Superkicks and finishers everywhere!

Winners = Sami Zayn & Kevin Owens Mac via pinfall following 3 haloumi kicks from Sami Zayn
7/10

New champions!

Pyro and celebrations and highlights of everything I just had to watch and see you tomorrow! Or in an hour!

WrestleMania XXXIX - Night One: The Awards

1. Best Match
   Sami Zayn & Kevin Owens Mac vs The Usos
   Good match and storytelling for once. Well worked. And everything else on this show was all sorts of boring.
2. Worst Match
   Seth Rollins vs Logan Paul.
   Rollins was slow and Paul is green as boogers. And even more unlikeable. And this just felt like a big commercial for all his brands. Don't buy his shit.
3. Highlight of the Show
   Not a whole lot... my hot cross buns?.
4. Lowlight of the Show
   The Miz as host. Although, I suppose that was better than him wrestling. But he went and did that, too...
5. Star of the Show
   John Cena? 
6. Best Celebrity Appearance
   Snoop Dogg for doing very little and earning a WWE title belt or something.
7. Worst Celebrity Appearance
   Lil' Uzi Nerd and his autotune pedal. That dude is garbage and if you like his music you need to have your spotify account cancelled.
8. Tonight's Meal
   It's early, so I kicked things off with breakfast wraps for brunch; hummus, eggs. spinach, sautéed mushrooms in a low carb spinach wrap. I thought maybe it was too early for Pepsi, so I had some classic 7up Light. But by the time Charlotte Flair hit my TV screen, I was reaching for the Pepsi-Max with Raspberry.
9. T-Shirt Cleanliness
   I did not spill a thing! Well, I actually did, but it didn't leave any stains. My Hart Foundation hockey jersey is safe. For now...
10. Overall Score
    Holy zombie Jeebus on his holy day was that one boring fucking show. Admittedly, the super bad was limited, but I just didn't give a fuck about anything happening and none of it was good enough to change my mind. The matches were all kinds of mediocre and these 'superstars' just have zero charisma. Hilariously, I had considered watching WCW Souled Out 1998 before this show and I think that would have made things so much worse; going from Bret Hart vs Ric Flair to the fucking Alpha Academy and Austin Theory would have had me going to church or something. I would like to say this was not the worst WrestleMania ever, but when I consider the fact this was twice as long as what I consider to be the worst WrestleMania, well... fuck this show.
    3 out of 10

WrestleMania March Madness, Day Twenty-Seven: WrestleMania XXVII

3 April 2011
Georgia Dome
Atlanta, Georgia - USA

Attendance: 71,617

Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry 'the King' Lawler & Josh Mathews

My thoughts before this viewing:
This was my first 'group viewing' of a WrestleMania since X-Seven. Like I've said before, watching these with others is the best way to enjoy them. We got together to watch because, of course, The Rock was returning to be awesome. He was. I believe we drank and ate fish and chips and generally didn't pay too much attention unless The Rock was on screen or the match was between people the others knew. It was good fun but I certainly do not remember this being a great WrestleMania. Apart from one match, I don't remember anything else being particularly outstanding. So let's see if the buzz of Bret Hart can be built upon by a returning Dwayne Johnson to make this show fun for me and everyone.

The everyone being my cats. They've been less than impressed with some of these shows.

Onward!

America the Beautiful
Keri Hilson is our singer tonight while the National Guard wave a giant American flag all over the place. She is singing all over the place and it ain't good. That end note was pretty good, though - I think that's what Nicole Scherzinger was wanting to do.
6/10

Opening Video
It's like an intro to a David Letterman show. "And here is your host... The Rock"
5/10

In The Ring
The Rock is here to give us a 10 minute introduction to the show by basically saying nothing. He promises this will be the most memorable WrestleMania in history.
7/10

Video Package
Oh another one? Fair enough - this one is actually for WrestleMania and not The Rock.
8/10

Opening Match
World Heavyweight Championship
Edge (c) (w/Christian) vs Alberto Del Rio (w/Brodus Clay & Ricardo Rodriguez)
Remember when winning the Royal Rumble meant you got to main event WrestleMania? Now I guess it means you get to open the show...

Edge has not come in as World Heavyweight champion as the last 3 WrestleManias, so don't believe the lies the commentators try to tell you. I forgot about this; Michael Cole is now the biggest bad guy in the company. He even has his own protective booth where he does commentary from. He is even more annoying than ever.
Winner = Edge via pinfall following spear
8/10

Edge smashes up Alberto Del Rio's fancy car. So, sore winner?
Hero!

Rey Mysterio vs Cody Rhodes
This year Rey is Captain America.

So I guess that makes Cody Rhodes the Winter Soldier?
Winner = Cody Rhodes via pinfall following crossrhodes
7/10

The arguing between the commentators is incredibly tiresome and distracting. Even Josh Mathews is already sick of it.

Backstage
Snood Dogg is here again! He is auditioning WWE Superstars to see who can go on tour with him. So much awful. And then Hornswoggle raps and I lose a piece of my soul.
-2/10

Big Show, Kane, Santino Marella & Kofi Kingston vs The Corre

This match was quicker than I could type how not interested I am.
Winners = the good guys following a punch to someone's face from Big Show
1/10

That's such bullshit; a closed fist is an illegal move in pro-wrestling, yet Big Show keeps doing it and winning matches using it. Get some better referees! And preferably ones that don't get knocked out in main events.

Backstage
The Rock hits on Eve. The dude sure has balls - she's married to a Gracie. He calls Mae Young a "divasaurus". I wish they were extinct. Good comedy here... and then this happens:

10/10

Video Package
Randy Orton kicked CM Punk in the head 3 years ago so Punk is finally getting revenge. Well, I guess at least he is acting on it a bit quicker than Orton would have.
8/10

Randy Orton vs CM Punk
CM Punk tries to be Bret Hart, but isn't quite there. But damn he is close.
Winner = Randy Orton via pinfall following RKO out of nowhere
8/10

Backstage
'Mean' Gene Okerlund tells The Rock that this WrestleMania is going great and The Rock thanks him. Not sure why you take the credit there, Rocky - you've done very little so far. Though you have been a far more active host than Kim Kardashian. Your ass is nowhere near as good, though. Anyway, The Rock meets John Cena's #1 fan - it's Pee Wee Herman. Again, all sorts of comedy that is actually funny. A rarity for WWE.
10/10

The Hall of Fame inductees are presented. Drew Carey finally made it in after such a long illustrious career in pro-wrestling. Hopefully my induction isn't too far away.

Jerry 'the King' Lawler vs Michael Cole (w/Jack Swagger)
Special Referee: 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin
Booker T and Jim Ross take over commentary. Michael Cole starts the match with a promo that goes longer than The Rock's introduction to the show. Then the match goes even longer. Like, waaaaaaaay too long. Especially since most of it is Michael Fcking Cole on offense. Finally, Lawler gets the upper hand and Steve Austin makes the end entertaining, but this was just not something that should have gone 20 minutes.
Winner = Jerry 'the King' Lawler via submission
1/10

Austin and Lawler celebrate and beat up Booker T for trying to join in the party. Then the Anonymous Raw General Manager pipes up on its laptop and announces that Austin cheated on Lawler's behalf, so Jerry Lawler is disqualified.

Winner = Michael Cole via disqualification
-5/10

Fuck you.

So Austin and Lawler beat up Josh Mathews for reading that email.
Alcohol problems and bullying, kids - those are the qualities of a hero.

Video Package
Triple H will do what no other man could do - end the streak!
Good luck, you've already failed before. Though WWE seem to make sure they don't mention that. Btw, Undertaker, you have not faced 18 men: you faced both Kane and Shawn Michaels twice, but then you did face two men at the same time once. So the correct total is 17. Did everyone at WWE fail mathematics at school?
8/10

No Holds Barred
Undertaker vs Triple H
The H bomb thinks he is Conan again and comes out to a Metallica song so as to make me dislike him and Metallica even more. Undertaker comes out to Johnny Cash so is so much more bad ass it isn't funny.
You know what else isn't funny? This match. It is fantastic.
Winner = Undertaker via submission
10/10

Triple H did actually have me and my friend fooled when first watching this match.
Undertaker actually has to be stretchered off because he took so much of a beating.

Mixed Tag Match
John Morrison, Trish Stratus & Snooki vs Dolph Ziggler & LayCool (w/Vickie Guerrero)
Remember Snooki? This was when she was kinda famous, I guess. She is pretty damn short! And she can actually do this:

Winners = the good team following Snooki's gymnastics
3/10

Video Package
Entirely dedicated to The Miz's rise from loser on a reality show to being a loser as the WWE Champion.
4/10

Main Event
WWE Championship
John Cena vs The Miz (c) (w/Alex Riley)
The Miz has big letters on the stage that spell out "AWESOME". My, how original!
John Cena has a huge intro again, this time with a choir and a prayer and other bullshit. Sounds like DMX talking. Why is DMX not here???
Jim Ross says this is Cena's 8th straight WrestleMania main event. You are a fucking moron, Jim Ross - he has main evented a total of 2 times before this. Opening match does not count as a "main event". Co-main event does not count as "main event". You are less believable than The Miz is as WWE Champion.
Fuck off.
Draw via double countout
3/10

The Rock comes out but before he can say anything, the Anonymous Raw General Manager sends an email. Why is the General Manager for a TV show getting to interfere with the results of a different TV show? The Rock starts reading the email, then decides 'fuck you, computer!'

The Rock orders the match to restart - "No countout, not DQ, no cryin' to your momma!"

WWE Championship
John Cena vs The Miz (c) (w/Alex Riley)
The match restarts... and The Rock takes out John Cena.
Winner = The Miz via pinfall following The Rock pwning John Cena
5/10

The Miz would like to celebrate successfully defending his title at WrestleMania, but that's just stupid so The Rock hits him with a Rock Bottom and then the people's elbow because fuck you it's The Rock's show!

The Rock celebrates as his theme sends us out.

WrestleMania XXVII: The Awards

1. Best Match
   The Undertaker vs Triple H
   I can't stand Triple H and everything about him... but that was one awesome match. The fact he is such a scumbag in real life made this match work even more for me because I figured he would be the type of guy to make sure he ended the streak.
2. Worst Match
   Jerry 'the King' Lawler vs Michael Cole
   Michael Cole is bad enough announcer. Now we know why he is not a wrestler instead. But seriously, that was time you could have spend doing something far more entertaining.
3. Highlight of the Show
   The Rock cracking comedy with Pee Wee Herman.
4. Lowlight of the Show
   Hornswoggle rapping.
5. Star of the Show
   The Rock. Not even close. He lifted this show and made me interested like no one has done since he left. And make no mistake, this show was aaaaalll about him.
6. Best Celebrity Appearance
   The Rock - technically I am allowed to use him, because he is a famous actor and was not here in a 'wrestling' capacity. Fuck you, it's my awards!
7. Worst Celebrity Appearance
   Snoop Dogg. Snooki was actually more entertaining - think about that.
8. Tonight's Meal
   Tonight was a weird combo; avocado, eggplant, onion, tomato, mushrooms, capsicum & chilli beans topped with carrot hummus. Was a strange combo but quite tasty and rather healthy, I thought. Back on the Pepsi Next since it is Friday night and I'm a party up in here. Reeses' Chips Ahoys are awesome. But real awesome, not that fake 'Miz is Awesome' style.
9. T-Shirt Cleanliness
   Didn't do too badly tonight. Though it is currently dark and I can't actually see it right now.
10. Overall Score
    Another enjoyable show! It went kinda downhill after Triple H beat the hell out of the Undertaker, or maybe I was just a bit burnt out after that match. But not nearly as bad as I remember it being. Maybe this home stretch is going to be some good times? Or maybe Pepsi Next is actually code for tequila and cocaine?
    5 out of 10