Kissathon II: Unfinished Business

After a rousing Friday evening concert by Kiss that rocked my world, I have decided to launch into Kissathon again in an attempt to close the book on this. My rabid fans will remember I did listen to all the music in time, just couldn't find the effort to write about the experience. I considered doing a random thoughts journal like I did for Ryan Adams, but it is much more fun to write about the albums one by one. Especially because there are so many.


This year I am playing on the Advanced level. Still not moving up to expert, because there is only so much Gene Simmons I will subject myself to. And two Tommy Thayer albums is more than any soul should endure.


So I will try and follow the original plan, but with a few added extras like the bonus disc from the Love Gun reissue, the Box Set tracks, and Ace Frehley's latest album Space Invader. Which would be awesome if Metropolis had given me my autographed copy that was supposed to be included with my VIP ticket to see Ace Frehley live this year...


Side note:
Don't ever support anything Metropolis Touring promote. They suck.


Anyways, this is now going to rival Ryan Adams in terms of marathonness. No idea how many songs it will be, or how I am going to end it because ending with a solo Ace album doesn't seem right. Maybe I make the box set the end? Maybe I end with some compilation? Or maybe I just listen to MTV Unplugged again for giggles. Who knows? Not me, but that's always part of the fun!


OK here we go. Buckle your seatbelts and get your butt comfy!

WrestleMania March Madness, Day Two: WrestleMania II

7 April 1986
Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum
Uniondale, New York - USA
Rosemont Horizon
Rosemont, Illinois - USA
Los Angeles Memorial Sports Arena
Los Angeles, California - USA

Attendance: 40,085 (combined)

Commentators:
New York - Vince McMahon & Susan Saint James
Chicago - Gorilla Monsoon, 'Mean' Gene Okerlund & Cathy Lee Crosby
Los Angeles - Jesse Ventura, Lord Alfred Hayes & Elvira 

My thoughts before this viewing:
I think I first saw this show when i was about 8. I say "I think" because I totally remember seeing a steel cage match between Hulk Hogan and King Kong Bundy but almost nothing else from this show. So maybe I didn't see the whole show? I watched it again a few years ago and it was OK - nothing special. So let's see how it rocks tonight. However, I am quite tired so it will need to be fun to make an impression...

Opening Video Package
We get some sexy saxophone music and quick little title card to tell us we are in New York. Talk about non-event...

America the Beautiful
No more national anthem, but Ray Charles is here to sing America the Beautiful. And he kills it because he is Ray Charles. Though over the song is lots of war footage. OK... And we end with a picture of Hulk Hogan looking heroic, because he represents truth, justice, and the American way!
6/10

'Mean' Gene says hi from Chicago, then sends us back to New York.
Pointless. Even more pointless? Adding this in here...

Backstage
'Rowdy' Roddy Piper cuts a promo about how much he is going to destroy Mr. T in a boxing match. He didn't say Apollo Creed was his boxing coach, so I'm not sure I believe him.
8/10

Opening Match
'Mr. Wonderful' Paul Orndorff vs The Magnificent Muraco (w/Mr. Fuji)
Instead of backstage promos, we get voice overs from the wrestlers while the match starts.
Orndorff gets racist at Fuji and Susan hits us with our first "uh-oh" of the evening. They will form the basis of her commentary tonight.
They brawl outside and the bell rings - looks like the match was thrown out but no one seems to know what the hell just happend - there is no announcement and the officials all just talk amongst themselves for a day.
Double Countout?
3/10

Total "uh-oh" count for the match = 4

The crowd chants "Bullshit!"
Great way to start the show!

Backstage
Mr. T is getting ready to talk with his fists
10/10

Macho Man cuts a promo about madness. He has that in spades.
8/10

WWF Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship
George 'the Animal' Steele vs 'Macho Man' Randy Savage (c) (w/Miss Elizabeth)
Susan thinks that Elizabeth should be dating Steele instead of Macho Man, so clearly she is either blind or has a mental disorder. Proving my point, Steele runs around the ring like he is impersonating Zoidberg.

Apparently, flowers are not an international object so both men decide to beat each other with them at will. Both Susan and Vince claim that Steele has great respect for women. Interesting... constantly making creepy romantic advances towards a woman that has made it abundantly clear she is not interested? I call that stalking
Winner = Randy Savage via pinfall with feet on the ropes
5/10

Total "uh-oh" count for the match = 19
Susan was on fire. And she didn't stop once the match was over - she still had plenty left in the tank.

Back to Chicago
'Mean' Gene is talking with Big John Studd and Bill Fralic - an American footballer. Studd is very annoyed about him so Fralic calls him "Dud". Burn!
2/10

George Wells vs Jake 'the Snake' Roberts
Vince doesn't believe Jake has a snake in his bag. Good to know you obviously don't bother to watch your own show, Vince. This is like a one-sided squash... until Jake reverses something and wins.
Winner = Jake 'the Snake' Roberts via pinfall following DDT
2/10

Total "uh-oh" count for the match = 6

Jake pulls out his snake while the "uh-oh"s rain down from Susan. In a moment that just sums up this show, Jake is doing his best to make it look like the snake is trying to kill George, but it clearly just wants to walk around the ring and chill out.

Vince and Susan are actually just sitting on some chairs and watching the show like they are on Donahue.

History of the feud between Mr. T and 'Rowdy' Roddy Piper.
Mr. T pities Piper - nothing else matters.
6/10

Backstage in Los Angeles
Jesse Ventura talks to Hulk. They go back and forth and it is all kinds of awesome.
8/10

New York Main Event
10 Round Boxing Match
Mr. T (w/Joe Frazier & The Haiti Kid) vs 'Rowdy' Roddy Piper (w/Bob Orton & Lou Duva)
Guest Ring Announcer: Joan Rivers
Guest Judges: Darryl Dawkins, Cab Calloway & G. Gordon Liddy
Guest Timekeeper: Herb

Cab Calloway is cool and I at least know who Joan Rivers is, but those other guys? You may as well have grabbed a few guys from the local Burger King and sent them out there for all I care

Mr. T looks about twice the size he did last year - I'm guessing he has changed his diet to more than just tuna and water. First round is even. Second round and Piper beats up Mr. T and knocks him down - what complete horseshit! Mr. T must be lulling him into a false sense of security. Round three starts and Mr. T proves me right by beating the snot out of Piper - even punches him out of the ring like Clubber Lang should have done to Rocky. Piper throws his stool at Mr. T to start round 4 and after getting punched in the face too many times, hits the ref and then bodyslams Mr. T to officially launch the first MMA fight.
Winner = Mr. T via disqualification
6/10

Total "uh-oh" count for the match = 17

They announce Mr. T as the winner and the crowd boos.
Fuck you, crowd.
Pretty sure this makes Mr. T the first UFC champion in history.

INTERMISSION

Shill for WrestleMania II merch. The t-shirt is actually cheaper this year - but no poster this time. Music is lame and does not inspire me to purchase goodies.

Vince sends us to Gorilla and 'Mean' Gene in Chicago. They have to share one microphone between them and take turns holding it - gotta love those budget cuts, right guys? Cathy Lee Crosby looks like she just came from Battlestar Galactica.

WWF Women's Championship
Velvet McIntyre vs The Fabulous Moolah (c)
This time the graphic says "Ladies Championship" but the announcer says "Women's championship". One day the WWF will figure out what they want to call this division. Velvet is not wearing shoes and almost falls out of her top when she misses a move, which means Moolah wins?
Winner = The Fabulous Moolah via pinfall following Velvet McIntyre missing a cross body block
2/10

Cathy refuses to mess up her hair by wearing the broadcast headset.

Flag Match
Corporal Kirchner vs Nikolai Volkoff (w/'Classy' Freddie Blassie)
Someone show Blassie a documentary about Charlie Chaplin so he can understand what happens to commie sympathisers in Hollywood...
Kirchner gets Blassie's walking cane and hits Volkoff to get the pin.
Winner = Corporal Kirchner via pinfall following international object
That means he gets to take home the Russian flag... but then forgets to take it - which Gorilla covers for by saying he doesn't want it.
Yawn.
2/10

20-Man Battle Royal - WWF vs NFL
Guest Timekeeper: Clara Peller (the "Where's the beef?" old lady)
Guest referee: Dick Butkus. What a funny name!

Lots of American football players. Lots. Shame I care nothing about American football.
But there is Bret Hart. BRET HART! How dare you boo the Hitman, Chicago! Bunch of savages...
And there is Bruno Sammartino! Why in the blue hell is Bruno here and not at the New York show? Good to know Vince McMahon was a complete dick back then as well.
Andre is just HUGE compared to everyone else in this match. Expect maybe Dan Spivey - he looks even bigger than Big John Studd. Perhaps Andre and Spivey should have done another slam challenge match instead? Bruno is looking short and slow... but then he beats up Studd like his is still a spritely 40 year-old man before being eliminated. Bruno and Bret should have just cleared the ring and had a 20 minute match refereed by Jet Li so the world could implode from the awesome. So much awesome.
Eventually it comes down to Andre the Giant against The Hart Foundation. As awesome as The Hart Foundation are, it is getting close to time for Andre's 3rd dinner so he throws them out and heads backstage to eat a bear.
5/10

Bret probably felt sorry for him and let him win...

Back to Vince and Susan
With 'Rowdy' Roddy Piper, who claims that Mr. T cheated by attacking him with his mohawk. Liar! Then he claims he was out-boxing Mr. T - double liar! Surprisingly, no "uh-oh"s from Susan.
8/10

Back to Chicago
'Mean' Gene is with some NFL guy - he is crying about someone cheating. Fuck off, you jock-douchebag. Here comes The Iron Sheik to talk jibberish and remind us that Iran and Russia are both number one because Highlander came out a month ago and Freddie Blassie is obviously ashamed to take this guy to the movies.
1/10

Chicago Main Event
WWF Tag Team Championship
The British Bulldogs (w/Capt. Lou Albano & Ozzy Osbourne) vs The Dream Team (c) (w/Johnny Valiant)
Ozzy Osbourne looks EXACTLY like Nigel Tufnel from Spinal Tap:

Gorilla and Gene discuss where Lord Alfred Hayes comes from in England because that relates to everything in this match.
Brutus Beefcake is still the man and totally wasted in this spot - he should be main eventing every show with that jacket of his.

Holy shit the Bulldogs are all kinds of awesome! This makes me want to watch some of their matches against The Hart Foundation.
Greg Valentine's head collides with The Dynamite Kid's head and is out.
Winners = The British Bulldogs via pinfall following head collision
New champions!
8/10

Ozzy holds up the belt and celebrates with Capt. Lou like Spinal Tap just won the titles themselves, while the Bulldogs are selling death outside the ring. Hilarious.

Back to Vince and Susan in New York
Vince tries hard to play up the challenge Hulk Hogan faces tonight. Susan just goes 'Yay Hulk!'
2/10

INTERMISSION AGAIN
Buy this t-shirt, dammit!

Now to Los Angeles with Jesse Ventura, our hero from last year Lord Alfred Hayes, and Elvira!
This is the best commentary team by a mile. And Jesse is still the best dressed man in the WWF.

Ricky 'the Dragon' Steamboat vs Hercules Hernandez
Elvira calls Steamboat a wimp - I guess Jesse has found a kindred spirit.
I zoned out and Steamboat won.
I may need some Pepsi.
Where's my sponsorship, yo?
Winner = Ricky 'the Dragon' Steamboat via pinfall following top rope cross body block
3/10

We cut to Jesse and he questions the director about the cue.
Then the Hulk Hogan/Lord Alfred Hayes video gets all kind of screwed up.
Live TV is a bitch, huh?
7/10 for the hilarity
 
Uncle Elmer vs 'Adorable' Adrian Adonis (w/Jimmy Hart)
Adonis' boobs are almost bigger than Elvira's, who says she does not trust a man with pink leg-warmers.
Winner = 'Adorable' Adrian Adonis via pinfall following top rope headbutt
2/10

WWF play LET'S TRY THIS AGAIN
Pre-recorded promo featuring Hulk Hogan and Lord Alfred Hayes. His Lordship talks shit to Hulk about his injuries, so Hulk tells him who the champ is.
7/10

Tito Santana & Junkyard Dog vs Terry & Hoss Funk (w/Jimmy Hart)
Elvira gets excited at the thought that someone might have a wardrobe malfunction. She also has a thing for Tito, which upsets Jesse.
Match swings from old school match to wild brawl before Terry Funk hits JYD with the Jimmy Hart's megaphone for the pin.
Winners = Terry & Hoss Funk via pinfall following assault with a megaphone
4/10

The chants of "Bullshit!" have now returned. He must be a popular wrestler in the WWF...

Time to build the cage. Jesse and Elvira kill time by making inappropriate jokes about dungeons in her home.

Recap of the Hulk Hogan/King Kong Bundy feud
Bundy attacked Hogan from behind and then gave him a million splashes, damaging Hogan's ribs and lower back. Hogan's doctor has told him not to go through with the match but Hulk has to defend his belt for all the Hulkamaniacs.
8/10

Backstage
Jesse with King Kong Bundy and Bobby Heenan. Bundy says he is sending Hogan to the hospital and will be the new champion - "Hulk Hogan doesn't have to like it!"
Why would he like you beating him up and taking his title?
Bobby Heenan is so awesome Jesse starts smiling.
8/10

Main Event
WWF World Heavyweight Championship
Hulk Hogan (c) vs King Kong Bundy (w/Bobby Heenan)
Guest Ring Announcer: Tommy Lasorda (WHO???)
Guest Timekeeper: Ricky Schroder
Guest Referee: Robert Conrad

Wow. Talk about a downgrade from the previous year. When Ricky Schroder is your biggest star, you know you got problems.

Hulk comes out to Real American and shakes the cage. That song would pump me up, too. Oh wait - it does! In fact, I think this was the only real song used all night.
Lord Alfred Hayes talks about Hulk having a great strategy while he gets choked out by Bundy - seems like a sound strategy, for sure!
Hogan goes for a body slam but Bundy is too fat. Being too fat is an underrated skill in pro-wrestling.
Bundy is bleeding which makes Elvira hungry.
Hogan 'hulks up' and slams Bundy! Then hits the mighty leg drop of doom and climbs out of the cage like a boss.
Winner = Hulk Hogan
5/10

Hulk then chases Heenan into the cage and beats him up for good measure. Because all good heroes should beat up smaller and weaker men.

Elvira tells Jesse if he can beat up Hulk she will go out with him. What a gold digger.

Back to Vince just so he can have the last word.
Fuck you and your ego, Vince.

Shill for the merch again to take us out...


Fuck this show.


WrestleMania II: The Awards

1. Best Match
   The British Bulldogs vs The Dream Team
   Not. Even. Close.
2. Worst Match
   Probably Corporal Kirchner vs Nikolai Volkoff
   But boy this was close.
3. Highlight of the Show
   Mr. T cutting a promo on 'Rowdy' Roddy Piper. That was pure gold.
4. Lowlight of the Show
   Every time the show went back to New York for pointless comments by Vince McMahon & Susan Saint James.
5. Star of the Show
   Hulk Hogan. His backstage segments were awesome. Honourable mention to Mr. T for being Mr. T. Bret Hart was too busy letting Andre win the battle royal to steal the show.
6. Best Celebrity Appearance
   Mr. T. Not even a competition this time.
7. Worst Celebrity Appearance
   I feel like Ozzy Osbourne achieved nothing except to try and take the tag team titles back to Spinal Tap. And no, I'm not giving up on that joke.
   The others can barely be called celebrities or had even less involvement than Ozzy.
8. Tonight's Meal
   Tonight's wrap was avocado, spinach, kale, cucumber, tomato, capsicum, red onion and alfalfa sprouts with vegetarian meatballs in a tomato and garlic sauce, topped with mustard. Delicious - will certainly be rocking that again. The Oatmeal Creme Pie is already feeling like I'm eating plastic, though I had one for each main event tonight so that could be why. I tried to stick with 7-Up to avoid caffeine but had to reach for a small hit of Pepsi Max when we hit the LA portion of the show.
9. T-Shirt Cleanliness
   Some serious stains hitting the shirt from the sauce and avocado.
10. Overall Score
    Not fun. Maybe I was just tired, but this show felt like a year-long collection of bad and boring matches. The constant ego stroking from Vince McMahon was annoying, Susan Saint James was 20 kinds of a awful, and the D-list celebrities just make everything seem worse. The production errors were kind of entertaining, though. And the promos/interviews were mostly awesome.
    4 out of 10
    
    
    

Two Important Pre-Marathon Notes

1. Official foods are locked in:

•  Main meal = wraps. Recipe will change each night, but will always be filled with a variety of salads and vegetables. Because Dujour means good health. And Dujour means tasty wraps.
• Additional snacks = carrot sticks with dip. Dujour means friendship.
• Tasty beverage = something from the Pepsi family. It's the choice of a new generation.
• Main Event Treat = the most ridiculous cookies I could find from the American food store:

• Little Debbie. Oatmeal Cookies. Fake plastic creme. Not sure this could be anymore American. Hopefully one a day won't kill me.

2. The t-shirt is done. And it looks pretty cool

At least, pretty cool for only costing me about the same as footlong from Subway.
It won't look like that in 31 days.

Onwards to the madness of WrestleMania!

Random Thoughts fom a Ryan Adams Marathon: Day 3

* Heartbreaker is the stuff of legend.

* The Q Division Demos are quite neat. Gimme Sunshine is such a neat little number and this also features a totally slow version of Rescue Blues. Plus a song called IdiotsRule the World.

* The Pinkheart Sessions part 1 is much better than I remember. Plus it contains his version of Around the World, where Ryan Adams just makes fun of the Red Hot Chili Peppers for 2 minutes. Hilarious stuff.

* The Suicide Handbook is fantastic. I think it would have been interesting had this been released instead of Gold. The songs that ended up on that album just sound so incredibly different.

* Gold gets a bad rap from Ryan Adams fans, but it remains a genuine classic to me. How can anyone diss an album that starts with New York New York? And yes, I'm well aware of the issues people have. Strangely, they are the exact reasons I love this album and always will.

* Fool's Gold is such a mixed bag. One day I will compile Gold to match the full double album and seperate these tracks that way.

355 songs down.

Random Thoughts from a Ryan Adams Marathon: Day 2

* A Stranger is Born is basically just Those Weren't the Days but in worse quality

* Forever Valentine features some seriously good stuff. Massive thumbs up for this.

* Stranger's Almanac has some serious moments of awesome. When people ask me of the goodness Whiskeytown have to offer, I will mash this album in their face.

* The Complete Fucker Demos is misleading. This sounds like a well produced album, not dislike something Ryan Adams would have released around 2007. Coolness.

* B-Sides and Rarities contains some good songs for sure. I Hope it Rains at My Funeral contains some seriously George Harrison-esque slide guitar.

* Pneumonia is just a straight up phenomenal album. Just a pure joy to listen to and an awesome way to end the Whiskeytown section.

* Destroyer is not a cover of the same-named album by Kiss. That's a real shame.

* Exile on Franklin St has some serious hilarity to it. Weird versions of songs that would become great plus just straight up weird songs. Interesting.

271 songs down.

Random Thoughts from a Ryan Adams Marathon: Day 1

* Blank Label is lame.

* Kotten is OK but I seem to forget anything about the music as soon as it finishes.

* Patty Duke Syndrome is seriously good. Somewhat similar to the rocking stuff Ryan Adams makes now. Must remember to listen to this more often.

* Exile on Daisy Street... lots of just... dirge? I don't know. You know when you go to a bar and the band playing are really pretentious and think they are playing like super progressive indy rock including 10 minute jams on the same boring chords? That is what these recordings are. 19 year-old Ryan Adams needed a punch in the face and someone to boo him off stage.

* The Skylarks is pretty much the same just shorter songs and better audio quality.

* The Space Madness Sessions is again more of the same. Ryan Adams obviously liked grunge a lot in the early 90s. However, the few tracks with a slight country influence are darn fun and would have been great if he revisted them with Whiskeytown (probably did - I haven't looked ahead to check).

* 1994 Solo Recordings is probably one of the most country things he's ever done, possibly due to the completely stripped back nature. Good stuff. Better recordings would be fun.

* it segued nicely into Rural Free Delivery, the first proper Whiskeytown recordings. Good straight up alt. country goodness

* Faithless Street is an album I never search out to listen to, however it must be noted it is awesome. Despite Ryan Adams' fake southern accent.

* The Freightwhaler Sessions are Whiskeytown with a bit less countryness and no fake Southern accent. Not bad things.

* Drunken Confessions is interesting. Listening to this you can kinda just picture some rednecks sitting around with instruments in their lounge making music. Not that DRA is a redneck at all, but by Prime that fake Southern accent makes him sound like one. Kinda think that is the point of it. Steal a Car is a mighty nice song.

* Those Weren't the Days is a top notch collection of quieter tunes. Like Ashes & Fire 20 years before it would exist. Further Down the Road is pure class and 10 Second Til the End of the World is just fantastic. Actually, this is really good. I'm guessing most of it can be found on Stranger's Almanac, which I will probably get to tomorrow.

115 songs down.

Kissathon 2013

And so it began on Monday - the greatest musical marathon known to mankind!

Well, actually only the 2nd craziest I have ever done. Pretty sure my Lennonthon many years ago was crazier. And don't get me started on the problems involved in ever trying to do an Elvisthon...

Anyways, I managed to form a rather impressive playlist to do this - 545 songs all up!
The album list looks like this:

• Kiss
• Hotter Than Hell
• Dressed to Kill
• Alive!
• Destroyer
• Rock and Roll Over
• Love Gun
• Alive II
• Double Platinum
• Ace Frehley
• Gene Simmons
• Paul Stanley
• Peter Criss
• Dynasty
• Unmasked
• Out of Control  - Peter Criss
• Music from "The Elder"
• Let Me Rock You - Peter Criss
• Killers
• Creatures of the Night
• Creatures of the Night (1985 Remix)
• Lick It Up
• Animalize
• Asylum
• Frehley's Comet - Ace Frehley
• Crazy Nights
• Live+1 - Ace Frehley
• Second Sighting - Ace Frehley
• Smashes, Thrashes & Hits
• Trouble Walkin' - Ace Frehley
• Hot in the Shade
• Revenge
• Alive III
• Criss (EP) - Peter Criss
• Cat #1 - Peter Criss
• Kiss Unplugged
• Carnival of Souls: The Final Sessions
• 12 Picks - Ace Frehley
• Loaded Deck - Ace Frehley
• Greatest Kiss
• You Wanted the Best, You Got the Best!!
• Psycho Circus
• Psycho Circus - Bonus Disc
• Alive! The Millennium Concert
• Live to Win - Paul Stanley
• One for All - Peter Criss
• Anomaly - Ace Frehley
• Sonic Boom
• Monster
• Destroyer {Resurrected}

That is a total of 50 albums, though I have kinda cheated a little; where compilation albums like Smashes Thrashes and Hits and You Wanted the Best... just have songs that appear elsewhere, I have only listened to the new tracks. Except Double Platinum and Greatest Kiss. I did listen to those completely. So yeah - I make no sense... and then throw in Ace's solo track from Spacewalk somewhere too...

There was a bunch of stuff I decided to exclude because it was just repetitive. That album they did a few years ago where they re-recorded all their most popular songs using the new lineup - no way in hell was I ever bothering with that. There were a few others involving the new lineup that I just did not see the point in. The less Tommy Thayer, the better.

I've gone in a good chronological order as well, except for one album - that being Destroyer {Resurrected}. Technically, I believe it came out after Monster, but I felt after sitting through 2 albums involving Tommy Thayer meant I had to end it on a happier note. Seriously, Tommy Thayer is no way to end a Kissathon this great.

Tommy Thayer - FUCK OFF

So here we are at Thursday night and how am I doing?
Well, not that great. I had a terrible first day due to annoying meetings (apparently listening to Alive! during business meetings is not the done thing) and now I am playing a bit of catchup before tomorrow. But I should be on track to finish at the end of work tomorrow. I'm looking forward to it.

As for results, I've been a little surprised by my findings so far.
But you will have to wait a little bit longer for those...

So let's see what I think of the albums, one-by-one...

Bored? Then Listen to a Ridiculous Amount of Kiss

Because that will solve all your problems.

Not really sure why I decided this, but I have only one week of work left before a two week holiday so figured it was the perfect time to do a Kiss music marathon.

Maybe it's because Summer is starting. Maybe it's because I want to get their play count higher in my iTunes. Maybe it's because I'm in a silly mood from watching so much Chikara. Maybe it's because I'm in a frustrated mood from not watching enough Chikara. Or maybe I've just been drinking way too much Tequila lately...

But yes, starting Monday morning - Kiss music marathon. Not only that, I will be using the wonderful world of mathematics to finally decide once and for all which Kiss album is the best. I will rate each and every song as I listen to it - some for the first time in years - and also some thought on each album. Then I will report my findings back to my readers, who I am sure can't wait to find out why I think Rock'n Roll Over is infinitely better than Sonic Boom.

Spoiler alert: No Thommy Thayer on Rock'n Roll Over.

So perusing my personal collection, as well as looking at other albums I can get beforehand, here is a chronological listing of what I will be listening to (in chronological order too):

Kiss

Hotter Than Hell

Dressed to Kill

Alive!

Destroyer

Destroyer (Resurrected)

Rock and Roll Over

Love Gun

Alive II

Double Platinum

Ace Frehley

Gene Simmons

Paul Stanley

Peter Criss

Dynasty

Unmasked

Killers

Music from "The Elder"

Creatures of the Night

Creatures of the Night (1985 Remix)

Lick It Up

Animalize

Asylum

Crazy Nights

Smashes, Thrashes & Hits

Hot in the Shade

Revenge

Alive III

Kiss Unplugged

Carnival of Souls: The Final Sessions

Greatest Kiss

You Wanted the Best, You Got the Best!!

Psycho Circus

Psycho Circus - Bonus Disc

Alive! The Millennium Concert

Sonic Boom

Monster

I'm also hoping to include all the solo work of the original members as well. I'm not going to bother with anything released outside of Kiss by Vinnie Vincent, Eric Carr or Bruce Kulick. And especially not Thommy Thayer.

So far, looking at a potential 51 albums to get through. Holy cow that is a lot of music!

It isn't that bad, though, because a few are compilations where I have removed the songs I already have. Their final grading will be mathematically graded accordingly to make sense. Unlike that sentence.

This will be fun. For me. Until the second day. Then who knows who this will go?

Stay tuned...

I Have a Plan

I can’t even remember when I last bLogged…

It really is a travesty that I don’t do this anymore. For you, the reader, anyway. So to further my belief that the world needs to be a better place I would like to publicly apologise and offer my intent to bLog a bit more. I at least have one major plan in the works.

30 WrestleManias in 30 Days

I think I came up with the idea for this a couple of years ago and have been anxiously awaiting the 30th WrestleMania finally taking place next year. All this planning and anticipation has led me to constantly make changes – and it is quite likely more will come in the next 6 months. Originally I had looked at making it a full journey through March because I thought it would time nicely with WrestleMania XXX airing on 30th March (US time) and then I could find a friend with Sky whose house I could invade and watch the event live for the first time ever.

Alas, my old friends Vince McMahon and HHH must have known of my intent and decided WrestleMania XXX would be best taking place the following Sunday. Jerks.

Instead, this ridiculous viewing marathon will begin April 1st (NZ time) which happens to be the 29th anniversary of when the first one took place. That is cool. Also means I won’t have to pay lots of money so I can watch WrestleMania XXX live – even cooler (thanks, Vince). Plus I am taking half of April off work due to Easter and my birthday (which I always take off) which will make it easier to watch these long shows in the evening, instead of having to rush home and get ready and then go to bed directly after the show. Because that wouldn’t happen. And then by the end of the 30 days I would just be tired and grumpy. Especially after watching a bunch of crappy WrestleManias.

After each show I will be coming on here to write about what I have just watched, rate the matches and show, etc. Because there aren’t enough wrestling reviews out there on the internet.

Of course, Logman likes to make things more interesting/difficult for himself, so in order to approach all 30 WrestleManias with the same attitude I will view them all in the same manner; I will have the same meal, drink the same drinks, and wear the same clothes. Yes, you heard me – I am going to wear a WrestleMania logo t-shirt for the entire duration of the shows. That isn’t to say I will wear it all day every day, most likely just for the actual shows themselves. I expect by WrestleMania XXX the t-shirt will be covered in all sorts of stains and smells, but that is the price I will pay. For food, I am planning on making burgers and fries for each show. I am still undecided on drink; the last few WrestleManias I have watched while drinking Corona, but I feel being a Mexican beer it isn’t really applicable to this show and should be saved for when I am watching Lucha Libre, and there aren’t any other beers I enjoy drinking (especially American beers). Pepsi Max will most likely be the drink of choice, but please feel free to offer suggestions.

As for each WrestleMania, I don’t plan on doing a play-by-play for every match – if you want that there are a million other sites that can give you that. Plus, half of my readers really don’t care about pro-wrestling. Instead I will just make note of the key points, make fun of stuff that deserves it (like Vince McMahon’s clothing and toupees) and then offer the following awards for every show:

1. Best match
2. Worst match
3. Highlight of the Show
4. Lowlight of the Show
5. Star of the Show
6. Best Celebrity Appearance
7. Worst Celebrity Appearance
8. Meal Rating
9. T-shirt Cleanliness
10. Overall Score

Then, once all 30 have been watched and enjoyed and made fun of, I will make an overall list of awards:

1. Best Match (including the Top 3)
2. Worst Match (including the Bottom 3)
3. Favourite Moment (with Honourable Mentions)
4. Most Embarrassing Moment (with Honourable Mentions)
5. Best WrestleMania
6. Worst WrestleMania
7. Total Number of Different Wrestlers (not really an award, but screw you I think that will be interesting)
8. Number of different celebrities (see above, minus the interest)
9. Most WrestleMania Appearances by a Wrestler (including Win/Loss Ratio)
10. Mr. WrestleMania* Award for Outstanding Awesomeness

This should be fun.

I’m in the midst of trying to track down live versions of as many WrestleManias as possible, because the ones I currently have are mostly the WWE Anthology versions which all have edits to the music and commentary – and even some of the matches – and I like to be excessive about these things. I want to hear the original theme every time Demolition come to the ring!

The real fun should be some of these I’ll be seeing with fresh eyes; believe it or not, I’ve only seen the first WrestleMania once (and that was the edited Anthology version), some I have only seen once or twice, while I’ve still not seen 21 through to 25. It will make for interesting viewing. I’m actually very excited to see all the 80’s and 90’s ones again. Not so much anything after that…

Until then, I may post every so often with hilarity. But I’ve just started watching the original series of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from the start and plan to finish the last episodes of that 31st March (see what I’m doing?) and since the universe is probably going to kill me once that finishes, I am trying to make sure there are no loose ends left behind.



*Shawn Michaels likes to refer to himself as Mr. WrestleMania, as do many wrestling fans. Especially fans of Shawn Michaels. But I am going to look at win/loss records, as well as who has the best matches to finally determine who the real Mr. WrestleMania is. And it won’t be Shawn Michaels**




**Shawn Michaels is an overrated douchebag 

Ferris Bueller's Day Off

A big 'OOPS' on my part - in my little tribute to the late John Hughes, I forgot to mention one of my absolute favourite movies of all time; Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

I have to give John Hughes a big truckload of respect for that film, as that movie is just so much fun. I don't think my life would be the same without it. Seriously. It is right up there with The Last Starfighter in terms of 'movies that define my childhood and subsequent years in my 20's when I was rediscovering my childhood because there is something disturbing in my brain'

If you haven't seen it, I can only imagine you are not my friend and you will be watching it in the next 24 hours. If you have seen it and don't enjoy it, I can only imagine you have no soul and were sent by the devil himself to make life miserable for others.

For everyone else, let's just watch some highlights and remember the talent that John Hughes had for giving us all some genuine good times in the 80's

In Our Most Convenient Definitions...

RIP to Mr. John Hughes.

Sad to think that another icon of life in the 80's has passed away - obviously the god of the 80's are not happy! How may we appease you, so that we that don't lose any more great artists who brought us joy in the decade of awesome???

Anyways, I just wanted to say that John Hughes was great. Even if he hadn't actually made a movie since 1991 (according to IMDB he was still writing under the name Edmond Dantes though). Seriously, I had no idea! Despite that, The Breakfast Club, Weird Science, Pretty in Pink and Sixteen Candles were core parts of growing up in the 80's. To this day I still remember the first time I watched The Breakfast Club when it was shown on TV, and they edited Judd Nelson's line of "Eat. My. Shorts." to "Eat. My. Shoes." Because somehow that was less offensive??? Still a great movie and def not the sort of thing Hollywood would try and attempt again - 5 kids stuck in a room all day with no other characters except a jackass of a principal.

And Sixteen Candles is just pure gold. Very easy to forget how funny that movie really is; I watched it with some friends a couple of years ago (they are a few years younger than me and had never even heard of it) and they were cracking up the whole way through. Good to see it still has relevance.

Thank you Mr. Hughes for all the memories.

R.I.P. King of Pop

Today the world lost one of music's true great artists. A man who re-invented pop music and inspired countless others.

I still remember as a child just how much worldwide each of his releases were; every new single was a major event - the premier of the new video was always heavily promoted and given its own time slot; gosh, I even remember how much of a big deal his new Pepsi commercial was!

Without Michael Jackson, dance would not be the same. Pop music would not be the same. The art of making a music video would not be the same.

He was my generation's Elvis; he contributed more to the evolution of music than we can comprehend, only to have later generations ignore his accomplishments, before being robbed so cruelly of his chance for a last hurrah. I wish he could have made those 'farewell' concerts in London and shown the world one last time why he is still loved by so many.

Let us all remember the man for giving us great music and spine-tingling performances like this:

A Tale of Heartbreak

Today was a very sad day in my life, as I found out that I missed out what could only be described as my lifelong dream come true...

MC HAMMER and VANILLA ICE REUNITED FOR A ONE-OFF CONCERT!!!

I don't how this managed to fly under my radar, but I am thoroughly distressed to know I missed what was most likely the concert event of the century.

I have already ordered my commemorative t-shirt from ebay, but it just won't be the same knowing I wasn't there to see Hammer and Ice join forces on U Can't Touch This

The Curries are Awesome

I'm going through a full on classic punk-rock phase at the mo; after being left at work with the actual option of music BUT forgetting to bring in the Beck cds I had got out and thus had to fill my day by loading Joan Jett and The Runaways playlists all day. And in one of those playlists was this absolute GEM of a song.

I love Joan Jett, I love The Runaways... and I now love the Currie sisters

Simon Barnett is a Fool

I started writing a post about how awesome robots are, but for some reason I can't be bothered finishing it right now. Which is saying something, because robots really are awesome. Instead, I will just quickly mention the annoyingness of Simon Barnett and people who so clearly care about social status.

You see, this morning on the radio (which I actually happened to be listening to for once) Simon and Gary were talking with an American man with a strong environmental message; he had kept all his rubbish for a year and worked hard to find ways to limit the amount of rubbish he created (he got it down to some incredible figure that I can't recall right now). It was very interesting and something that people should be thinking about because recycling isn't the one final answer to our waste problems and humans should be doing what we can to cut down.

Then as they are wrapping up, instead of giving everyone his blog address or any sort of information on anything they talked about, how does Simon sign off?

"I read you were a cameraman on the movie Wedding Crashers. I'm a big fan of Owen Wilson, and it was really sad to hear about that incident with him last year. What's he like as a person?"

Are you for real, Simon? I realise you crazy pentecostal christians think rich and famous people are what we should aspire to be (hence you all love John Key so much) but was that really what that interview should have ended with? The final impression you want to leave with your listeners is not how they can help reduce their waste and thus promote environmental awareness - daresay, the reason this man spoke to you in the first place - but that Owen Wilson is funny and how cool it is to work in Hollywood???

Where's Mr. T to pity some fools when you need him...

Russell Crowe + Ridley Scott = Retarded

I have respect for Ridley Scott; the man has done some great sci-fi films.

Unfortunately for him, Robin Hood is not a science fiction character.

I just finished reading this interesting interview with Ridley Scott. And by interesting, I mean not really; it's basically the usual yawn-ish arrogance from a Hollywood director, who is then asked about the upcoming production of Robin Hood (original title there). Now my gripe with this film since I first heard about it was of course that the awesome Russell Crowe was cast as Robin himself. I don't think I've liked Crowe in anything since he did that budget Australian film where he played a gay man that put his life on hold to look after his sick father (I can't remember the name right now. Sue me. Or disconnect my internet - just say I have infringed on your copyright and laugh all the way home. Unless you are already home; then just laugh your way to the couch or something)... where the hell was I? Oh yeah - I can't stand Russell Crowe. I don't even begin to understand the stupidity of casting the man as Robin Hood - it's actually making Kevin Costner look good right now. When he was supposed to be doing both parts, I did kind of see him as the Sheriff of Nottingham, but oh well...

But now Ridley Scott is saying crazy stuff like: '“Robin Hood is in the army of Richard Coeur de Lion,” he said of how we’ll find the character early in the film “He is a bowman in the army of Richard Coeur de Lion.”' And then there is that whole thing about the French being the villains...

So not only is this rogue a big ugly doofus, but he's in the army? And battling the French? Even a 5 year-old with access to Wikipedia could tell him that stories of Robin Hood actually show him to be from around the 14th or 15th Century - despite Scott going on to give us a history lesson that shows he about as much understanding of this era as Oliver Stone does of Alexander the Great, meaning they've probably read the same encyclopedia written by Donald Rumsfeld (you know, the one that also omits how the US were responsible for putting their dreaded nemesis Saddam Hussein in power in the first place. They didn't realise he wasn't a REAL American!)

Considering the awesomeness that this movie will possess, here some others they could cast to take the film to that 'blockbuster' position that it deserves:



Scott 'Big Poppa Pump' Steiner as 'Little' John

It's been a while since he of the negative percent body-fat has appeared on my blog, but who better to play the role of Robin's right-hand man? I can just hear him shouting at Robin now - "ROBIN HOOD! YOU 'N ME... GONNA GIT THIS RICH BASTARDS... AND GO FOR SOME ACTION WITH... WITH MAH FREEK, MAID MARION... HOLL A IF YA HEAR ME!!!" Plus he has his own medieval head-dress already.
And he hates France

Ben Stein as Friar Tuck

With Ridley Scott's blistering historical knowledge, he will be looking to cast this film in the most accurate manner. And what says 'Friar' better than a weedy old Jewish creationist who used to write speeches for Richard Nixon?

Hood?... Hood?... Hood?...

Judge Dredd as The Sheriff of Nottingham

The role may be a lot less important to Ridley Scott, but he will still need to be an authoritative character nonetheless, and Judge Dredd has authority stamped all over his helmet (it's on the inside - that's why you can't see it). Plus his outfit is weird - just a like French person! Probably gets all the ladies too, the bastard...

See?
You don't need to be a Hollywood director to make a movie look stupid.

I Feel Your Pain, Joaquin

My sideburns have been pretty itchy today.
But it's not a nervous tick. It's just them eating my face.

Quote of the Week

"I am more determined than ever to fight to clear my name."
- Tony Veitch outside court after he was charged with 7 counts of assault.

Ummm, dude - you already admitted to beating her. Remember that?
Unless you plan on taking that back and find some magical spell to make EVERYONE IN THE UNIVERSE FORGET, then I don't know how you plan to clear your name.

Also, pretty funny that he claimed it was a one-off 'lashing out' (you know, when he made all those excuses about it being a very dark time for him and all that), yet he's been charged with another 6 counts of man on woman assault for incidents between 2002 and 2006.

Enjoy calling the inter-prison rugby tournaments, scumbag!

Tales From NZ - The Land of Idiots

Looking at all this furore over Tony Veitch beating the stuffing out of his partner in 2006, I find one thing very interesting:

Namely, so many people think he is still a "great guy" and that this is no one's business. Furthermore, that he shouldn't be prosecuted because he paid her so much money and has said he is sorry.

I'm sorry, but what freekin' century is this country stuck in?!?! Have we all gone backwards and decided that hitting a woman is OK? How about knocking her to the ground and repeatedly kicking her with such force that she suffers broken vertebrae and head injuries - is that what a "great guy" does??? Or was it the fact that he gave her $100,000 to keep her mouth shut so he wouldn't lose her job? Yeah I guess that was pretty "great"

I am honestly sickened by the reaction by people of this country. On the radio the other night, countless women called in to say that people should just leave him alone and that if she didn't press charges then it must be OK. Yes, I'm sure that's why she didn't press charges - I wouldn't be at all afraid of someone who had just beaten me to the point where I had a broken back and couldn't walk.

The other common argument in his defence is 'If he was just an average guy not on TV then no one would care.'

WRONG! And on so many levels.

Firstly, if he were not on television it would still be reported by police and therefore public knowledge. And a court case that garners public attention, as such a violent crime would, is not going to be attractive to ANY employer.

Secondly, the fact is this guy IS on television every night (and the radio as well) and as such has the public image of his employers at stake. Would you hire Mike Tyson to present your sports news? No. And not just because his speech is mangled and less intelligent than an old man eating a box of marbles. You wouldn't hire him to do that job because it would make your station look completely bogus to have it fronted by a nut job that beats women.

And thirdly, if this was just an average guy from down the road you would all condemn him and expect him to be prosecuted. I hope.


And if it is indeed true that TVNZ knew about this incident long before the public, then someone needs to answer some questions over there too.

Maybe Tony Veitch can place a big rugby ball under his arm and the hell off my TV as well?

I Am the One and Only LOGMAN

Yesterday I read about a promo Bret Hart gave a few years ago, in which he made a direct quote from the song "Bullet with Butterfly Wings" by Smashing Pumpkins. So, naturally, I spent the rest of the day trying to see if I could find a copy of it online for my viewing pleasure. And to show Brad once and for all just how awesome Bret Hart truly is.

Don't worry - this is going somewhere.

Anyways, I tried many different approaches, until I searched google using the term "bret hart + smashing pumpins". Try it, and then go to page 2 of the searches. And what do you see at the top of that page?

MY blog!

Crazy. The link it comes up with is to my May 2007 entries. It made me laugh, anyway.

So in that vein, I decided to google "Logman". Want to know how long it took before this blog appeared?

4 pages!!!

And even then it was at the bottom of the 4th page! My blogger profile came up before it, showing me how little hits this blog gets. I feel so insignificant.

But what was worse was seeing some guy on here called LogMan - because he build houses. Chump.

Oh what a sad way to end the day...


No wait. It's not over yet...