UWF Fury Hour: Episode 19

UWF Fury Hour Episode 19, 4th March 1991

Craig and Bruno hype a new tag team called The Power Twins. Tonight, we will also finally see an end to the feud between B. Brian Blair and 'Cowboy' Bob Orton. Sure...

Herb has returned to the intro to keep me happy. He yells that 'Wild Thing' Steve Ray & Sunny Beach are now teaming up and their tag-team will be called "Wet N' Wild".

'Dr. Death' is still waiting for your calls.

'Dr. Death' Steve Williams vs Carmine Albano

'Dr. Death' suffers a bit of a cut above his eyebrow, which makes him mad and seek revenge on the poor nephew of Captain Lou. 'Dr. Death' beats Albano up on the concrete carpet and Bruno says he's not giving his best.

Winner = 'Dr. Death' Steve Williams via his running turnbuckle slam thing

The Power Twins are here and they want to fight people that can tie shoes and put on pants.

Bruno Sammartino now has his own hotline or something.

Ask The Wrestlers

'Wild Thing' just says "Beep beep beep" a whole bunch of times. Way to answer the question. I'm sure you totally made that kid's day.

Wet N' Wild vs The Power Twins (w/Rick Golden)

Rick Golden is like a small Ramone or something.

He punches Sunny Beach and runs away. Apparently there is someone in the crowd that writes "a very informative newsletter" that has been covering the UWF. Are they talking about me and my bLog?

Winners = Wet N' Wild via disqualification I'm guessing but no one ever actually gave us a result

Herb asks Wet N' Wild what brought them together as a team and they have absolutely no answer. These two are just the best good guys...

Captain Lou Albano also now has his own hotline. UWF just handing out hotlines now??

Captain Lou's Corner

Cactus Jack is sick of Albano making jokes about him. What a shock; Albano says he respects Jack's skills but not the way he does things and then says he can't even talk to him.

Hard to believe that after 19 episodes this fucking segment is actually more pointless than ever.

The Gulf War has ended! But you should still buy the UWF Support the Troops t-shirt or you're not a real American!

B. Brian Blair (w/Captain Lou Albano) vs 'Cowboy' Bob Orton (w/'The Golden Greek' John Tolos)

This is announced as "The war to settle it all!". So this is the UWF's version of Hulk Hogan vs 'Rowdy' Roddy Piper? It seems the headbutt has caused Honey permanent damage and she can no longer appear with B. Brian Blair, so Albano is taking over as Blair's manager. Yay. Bruno: "So far it's been a good wrestling match." No, it's been fucking boring. Orton piledrives Blair on the concrete carpet and... WTF?!?

Winner = B. Brian Blair via disqualification?

Not such a war - more a bag of shit. And it settled nothing, other than UWF booking is bullshit.

Craig: "B. Brian Blair will walk out of this one the champion". Oh fuck off. The referee claims Orton used an international object, despite that clearly not being the case.

Thoughts:

• Have I said "fuck this show" recently? Because fuck this show.