UWF Fury Hour Episode 36, 8th July 1991
Tradition and fundamentals is totally what UWF is all about! I guess this boring and ill-informed opening video package means it's time for more matches from The Beach Brawl! And maybe more office interviews?
Today Craig sends us to the trailer for the latest Jean-Claude Van Damme movie: Double Impact. Hard to believe I've not seen it! But then again, there are a lot of Jean-Claude Van Damme movies I've never seen. I once planned to bLog a 'June-Claude Van Damme', where I watched 30 Jean-Claude Van Damme movies each day in June (get it?). It might be something to revisit...
Tonight we will relive the last 2 matches from Beach Brawl, plus a
Recap of the feud between Colonel DeBeers and 'Mr. Wonderful' Paul Orndorff. Which was actually a feud between Colonel DeBeers and a black referee and 'Iceman' King Parsons and Billy Jack Haynes. Not once does 'Mr. Wonderful' make an appearance in those "highlights".
Strap Match
'Mr. Wonderful' Paul Orndorff vs Colonel DeBeers
At least DeBeers comes out to Shout at the Devil. Maybe that album is the only CD Herb Abrams owns? I just realised they've never actually explained the rules of a strap match. Bruno even seems unsure of what the rules are.
'Mr. Wonderful' Paul Orndorff vs Colonel DeBeers
At least DeBeers comes out to Shout at the Devil. Maybe that album is the only CD Herb Abrams owns? I just realised they've never actually explained the rules of a strap match. Bruno even seems unsure of what the rules are.
Winner = 'Mr. Wonderful' Paul Orndorff via piledriver
I don't recall my review during the PPV, but this match was not bad. However, the ending with the taser is fucking stupid. Craig's explanation of the "stun gun" is also fucking stupid. Orndorff convulses in the ring, so Bruno is very troubled.
Orndorff is in the office!
He feels there is no place for racism in pro-wrestling. I like that he pretends that he was the only person DeBeers was feuding with, like Billy Jack Haynes was never here. Craig tries to tell Orndorff that DeBeers embarrassed him by using the taser and Orndorff is like nope I was not embarassed - I won the match. Apparently DeBeers took a flag that was given to Orndorff by a little boy and Orndorff wants it back? Orndorff also owns a bowling centre where celebrities come to bowl and not drink alcohol because he refuses to sell it. He also admits he is not good at bowling. Crazy.
Now we're back at the office with "the despicable one", Colonel DeBeers.
Brian makes fun of him for choosing the match stipulation and then losing the match. DeBeers references the Rodney King beatings, I'm guessing. He complains Craig and Brian aren't in uniform? What? DeBeers can't spell his own name thinks. He mentions Mr. Black, who only appeared once and was then fired. Apparently he did everything for DeBeers but how can anyone confirm that? I only ever saw him standing with DeBeers once and doing nothing else. Didn't even get him a glass of water or anything. He says that America is second-class compared to South Africa, and yet he's "adopted" a flawless American accent... "South Africa doesn't have slaves, just cheap labour". He says Orndorff has HIV, so he didn't want to make him bleed. Jeebus this guy... is just... not good.
Brian makes fun of him for choosing the match stipulation and then losing the match. DeBeers references the Rodney King beatings, I'm guessing. He complains Craig and Brian aren't in uniform? What? DeBeers can't spell his own name thinks. He mentions Mr. Black, who only appeared once and was then fired. Apparently he did everything for DeBeers but how can anyone confirm that? I only ever saw him standing with DeBeers once and doing nothing else. Didn't even get him a glass of water or anything. He says that America is second-class compared to South Africa, and yet he's "adopted" a flawless American accent... "South Africa doesn't have slaves, just cheap labour". He says Orndorff has HIV, so he didn't want to make him bleed. Jeebus this guy... is just... not good.
Oh wow now we get a replay of the Captain's Corner segment at The Beach Brawl where Captain Lou Albano just buried The Blackharts and then walked out of the ring. Very worthwhile.
The Killer Bees
Still not the Beach Brawl main event? I guess that's how they can make this Beach Brawl recap last another week...
I reviewed this match before. It may have been worse than I remembered.
I reviewed this match before. It may have been worse than I remembered.
Winners = The Killer Bees via dropkick
Dan Spivey is coming back to the UWF? Hopefully you've still got some t-shirts in stock!
Thoughts:
- Shit went downhill fast after the Orndorff/DeBeers match.
- DeBeers with his racist nonsense is one thing. To say Orndorff has the aids is just another level.
- WCW this week; Ric Flair just got stripped of the belt and PN News continues to rap out of time and shout Yo Baby Yo. The clear winner.
- There are still 10 episodes left and I can't possibly imagine how this company is actually able to continue after this week.
No comments:
Post a Comment